She stared up at me. Dark curls framed both sides of her forehead, tucked neatly beneath her straw bonnet. Her eyes were hard and calculating as they traveled over every inch of my face. “I don’t believe I permitted you to call me by my Christian name.” Her voice snapped through the air, harsh and quiet.
“Forgive me.” My mind raced. My plans already felt entirely out of control. I had anticipated a slightly different reunion than this. I had expected Arabella to be upset after the night before, but not as angry and cold as she was now, glaring up at me. Even Mrs. Ollerton had been incredibly hostile. “I shall refer to you as Miss Sharp if that is what you prefer.”
“And what do you prefer?” Arabella took a step closer, her chin lifted high. “Shall I call you Colin or Clark?”
My skin went cold.
How did she know?
All the words I had rehearsed were trampled under her feet. My throat was dry. “Clark.” I held her gaze, my heart pounding fast against my ribs. “I planned to tell you tonight. But how did you?—”
Her nostrils flared, and she turned away from me, marching toward the railing that overlooked the river. She stared down at the water, her jaw tight. The occasional passerby glanced in our direction, obviously sensing the tension between us.
I turned toward the river beside Arabella, gripping the balustrade as I leaned forward, desperately trying to catch her gaze. “How did you know?”
She turned to face me, a hot fire burning in her eyes. “I knew it was not you at the ball last night. I made the discovery myself, though I cannot begin to imagine the cruelty that would induce you to lead me to believe you cared for me when you did not.” The fire in her eyes melted into a sheen of tears, but her voice was still harsh. “Why did you do it? What purpose could you have possibly had in deceiving me so heartlessly?”
Dread settled in my stomach. I wanted to hold her face in my hands so she couldn’t look away again, to somehow soften the pain that lingered in her eyes, but I knew she would not let me. I swallowed hard, a wave of guilt climbing up my throat. “I called you here so I could try to explain.”
She glared up at me. “There will be no need for that. I believe I have already come to the correct conclusion without your assistance.”
“No, I don’t think you have.” Frustration rose in my chest. “I never meant to hurt you.”
“How?” she snapped. “How could you have not meant this to hurt me? I knew your brother hated me when I spoke to him at Lady Benton’s dinner party weeks ago. I knew I did not have a chance to marry him, so I told him I was seeking a fortune. I believe that from that moment on, my interactions were with you and not Colin. Do you deny it?”
“No, but?—”
She turned to face me fully. “Your brother sent you to court me, did he not? He wanted me to fall in love with you and then realize that you didn’t have a fortune.” Her eyes gleamed with tears. “Am I correct?”
Silence thrummed between us for several seconds before I forced the word past my throat. “Yes.” I couldn’t lie to her, but there was more—far more—that she did not understand.
The look of disgust on her features tore my heart in two. She turned to march away from me, but I took hold of her arm just as I had in the stairwell. “Arabella, wait.” I circled in front of her, my breath coming quickly as I struggled to find the right words to appease her. “I did impersonate Colin at his bequest, but I didn’t want to. I owed him a debt and this was how he asked me to repay him. I believe he thought it was a harmless hoax that would teach you not to hunt the fortunes of the other men here in town. I cooperated for my own selfish reasons, but I neverthought that I would grow to care so deeply for you. I never thought I would fall in love with you, but I have.” My breath caught in my throat.
A tear rolled down her cheek, but she hid her face from me, wiping it away. “And why should I believe you now?” Her voice cracked. “You have been lying to me all along.”
“Have you not also been lying to me?”
Her eyes flew up to mine with a glare. “There is no comparison.”
“You cannot pretend you haven’t also been hiding something from me. Is your family in debt? Is there a dire financial strain you haven’t disclosed? Why were you seeking a fortune in the first place?”
Her gaze flickered away, and for the first time that evening, I saw a hint of uncertainty. She was silent for a long moment, and then she turned back toward the river. Her shoulders shook as she took a deep breath.
I wished I could have comforted her somehow, but she wouldn’t allow me to touch her.
Her eyes glistened in the fading light as she watched the swimming ducks down below. “You have seen our lodgings on Milsom Street. A woman cannot be faulted for desiring more than that.” Her voice grew quiet. I still felt like she wasn’t telling me the entire story. “But I have been honest all along about my identity and about my reasons for courting you. I never hid the fact that I was seeking money. That was what surprised me so greatly about your pursuit. Part of me knew all along that it wasn’t real.”
My jaw tightened. “Itwasreal. It became real. I knew you were a fortune hunter, and I knew that I didn’t have a fortune to give you. I knew how unwise it would be to fall in love with you, yet it happened still. My feelings could not possibly be more genuine. Please trust me.”
Her eyes met mine, still heavy with anger. “I find your choice of words entirely hypocritical.” Her eyes darkened. “Youwere a fortune hunter first. I know about the woman whose fortune you were hunting in Derbyshire. I know how you left her at the church. Why would you do that?”
I looked down as a wave of shame overtook me. Arabella had been quite busy investigating my past, it seemed. She had uncovered everything about the ruse and even the worst mistakes of my life. I felt completely bare and vulnerable, exposed to her harsh judgment. “I should never have courted her. I should never have proposed. But I learned that day that I couldn’t marry someone I didn’t love.” I held her gaze for several seconds. “Can you?”
Arabella scowled, but her eyes were still wet with tears. “What?”
“Can you marry a man you don’t love in order to obtain a fortune?” I breathed deeply, my heart in my throat. “Or would you rather marry for love?”
She scoffed, placing one hand on her hip. “I expect that is the lesson you and your brother intended to teach me? I will not cooperate with your game any longer.” She turned to leave, and this time she was too quick for me to grab her arm.
