Mom steps closer to me, setting her coffee down to pull me into a hug. I’m caught off guard, but it’s nice.
“I love you,” she says, backing away, but not before making me feel like a little kid again as she reaches up to brush my hair back. “Thank you for being there for Kaitlyn.”
“I love you too,” I say, letting the words sink in.
I don’t mention Hunter and Kaitlyn breaking up as we finish our coffee before going out back. I’m a little surprised Kaitlyn doesn’t come down, but it’s nice spending time with Mom just the two of us. It reminds me of how things used to be before I ruined everything.
“Hey, Mom?” I ask, paddling toward her after easing off of the small wave I caught.
She squeezes water out of her hair, and her emerald eyes are glowing. “Yeah?”
“Have you talked to Hunter?”
“Yeah. He called me on the way to Uncle Owen’s house,” she says, her face seeming to shift with understanding of why I’m asking.
I think about the message I sent him last night, and I wonder if he knew Kaitlyn was here. She didn’t say how they left things, and he was already gone by the time I got back from the hospital. I had no way of knowing what happened until Kaitlyn knocked on my door, but based on how tense things had been since his transfer, I don’t know what to expect. “Is he okay?” I ask, looking away because I’m afraid of what I’ll see.
“He will be. He was with Kaitlyn for a long time, but it’ll just take some time. Don’t give up on him yet.”
“I’m not giving up on him, but the last thing I want to do is hurt him, or make him hate me more than he already does,” I say, trying to make sense of the mess inside of my head. The mess that’s about to be my reality.
“I think whatever’s meant to be will happen regardless of how anyone feels about it. If someone had told me twenty-five years ago I’d end up marrying your dad and having four kids, I would have laughed in their face,” she says, laughing quietly. “I know I don’t understand everything you’ve been through, but I do know you and Hunter are brothers, and nothing will ever change that. Not even a girl, as wonderful as she is.”
“She is,” I murmur in agreement.
“When you’re ready to talk about it, I’m always here.”
“Thank you,” I say honestly, letting the water lap over my legs as the sun rises higher in the sky, the shades turning morepastel. “Would you want to go take photos with me soon? Maybe show me some of your tricks?”
A smile so bright forms on Mom’s face, you’d think I just told her she was my favorite parent.
“Oh, thank fucking god. I had hoped, but it’s about time one of you took after me instead of your father. Just let me know where you want to go, and I’ll make it work.” Mom looks quite pleased with herself, and I wish I had asked sooner. I like being able to make her happy. It’s the least I can do after everything.
Maybe one of the goals I should set is to give myself some grace for the choices I’ve made.
CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO
Kaitlyn
PAST
After the ocean, the Walkers’house in the Jura Mountains is my second favorite place on Earth.
The only thing that would make this trip better is if Bailey were here, but Thalia and Sebastian said that maybe the only way to get through to him is to see there’s consequences for the way he’s been acting. Mirabelle and Henry volunteered to stay with him, and I get the reasoning for making him stay at home, but I can’t help wondering if maybe a change of scenery might have helped B out of his funk.
He’s been silent for months now, and it hurts to watch him isolate himself. I could try pushing him to talk to me again, but since that worked so well last time, I’m not sure what to do. It feels like a lose-lose situation either way, and I don’t want to dwell on Bailey the entire time we’re here when I should be enjoying my time with Hunter.
Hunter and I went to visit my grandparents earlier today with my parents, and it was nice to see how excited my extended family was for me to introduce him as my boyfriend.
Still, I can’t help wishing Bailey were here.
I twist my damp hair into a braid as I walk down the stairs,wondering what game we’re going to play tonight. It’s no fun to play Yahtzee without Henry here to torment, but it might be nice to win at another game for a change.
I see Mom carrying a bottle of wine into the living room as my dad follows behind her dutifully with glasses, and Hunter’s setting up Pictionary while Thalia rolls her eyes at whatever Sebastian just said to her. “Bash, I’m insulted you think I’d cheat by helping you.”
“I did not ask you to cheat,” he’s quick to add, glaring at Thalia, and Dad frowns.
“Do you think we can’t win without Mom throwing the game?” Hunter asks, looking annoyed already with his dad.
