CHAPTER FORTY-SEVEN
Kaitlyn
NOW
I’ve beenawake for what feels like hours, listening to the steady rhythm of Bailey’s heart beating in his chest.
The hardest part about yesterday wasn’t learning what he did to survive, but seeing how quickly he lost faith in himself. It broke my heart into tiny pieces realizing what the weight of this secret did to him.
I had a feeling there were still things B was holding back from me, but I wish he’d had the chance to share them on his own timeline instead of having that choice taken away.
I wish I’d been able to tell him in a happier moment how in love with him I am, but I think it was really important for Bailey to hear it.
Fuck, I can’t believe he thought I’d break up with him over this?
Bailey stirs underneath me, his arms holding me tighter for a moment before he relaxes again.
I hate Kiera for doing this to him. I get the whole woman-scorned act after hearing how Sebastian gave her the same ring he proposed to Thalia with, but to get revengetwenty-five years later by spilling the secrets of their youngest kid? It’s unhinged.
We’ll probably never know why she really did it, but I can’t think of a reason good enough to justify the interview she gave.
Unfortunately, the Walkers’ lawyer said that Kiera used enough of the truth that she couldn’t be sued for defamation of character, even if what she did was cruel. They did file a cease and desist order against Kiera and the network that aired the interview, because an argument could be made that Kiera’s actions fell under threatening behavior. The damage was already done, just like when Henry and Mirabelle’s audio was leaked, and the second an article gets taken down, three more pop up to replace it.
“Kait? You awake?” Bailey’s voice rumbles, still laced with sleep as he moves again underneath me.
“Yeah,” I whisper, not ready to get up for the day.
“G’morning,” he whispers, pressing a kiss to the top of my head.
“Good morning.”
I wonder if he knows there’s still plastic stars stuck to the ceiling. I remember when we were kids, and I dreamed of being a mermaid while Bailey wanted to be an astronaut.
“How long have you been up?” he asks, turning to face me, and I lift my head to rest it on the pillow.
“I’m not sure,” I admit, lifting my hand to cup his cheek.
If I had my things here, I would’ve gotten up to paint the sun glinting off the water yesterday before everything changed. I can already see in my mind how I’d mix the shades of blue, green, and white together to create the perfect, happy moment.
Bailey lifts his hand to rest it on top of mine, but all I can see are the shadows of his face. I brush my fingers over the stubble. “You okay?”
“I should be asking you that,” I whisper, counting in my head where I know the seventeen freckles that dot his cheeks and nose are.
“But I asked first.”
“I’m sad, but I’m okay. I don’t want how I’m feeling to take away from what you’re going through,” I admit, and Bailey moves my hand to hold it to his chest, where my head rested for most of the night.
“It’s not taking anything away from me. Will you tell me why you’re sad, sunshine?” he asks, and I don’t want to make him uncomfortable. “Please?”
I flatten my hand against his chest, feeling how real and warm he is underneath my palm and fingertips.
“I’m afraid to ever make you feel like you’re doing something you don’t want to. I’m sad because I don’t know if I already have, but I think you’re too nice to say anything.”
“Never,” Bailey answers without hesitation. “I meant it when I said I’m yours. Everything we’ve done, I’ve wanted.”
“Promise?” I ask, feeling guilty that I’m making him comfort me right now.
“I promise I didn’t feel pressured, but if it makes you feel better, we can have a safe word for if either of us ever want to stop and check in with the other?”
