Not right now.
Not when the only man I’ve ever loved is beside me, his hand still resting at my neck like he doesn’t want to let me go.
How am I supposed to fake interest in anyone else when this—this—is within reach?
My chest tightens.
Because that’s the other side of it, isn’t it?
What if this isn’t real?
What if this is just…
Closure.
A better ending than the one we had before.
A way for him to make peace with the past and move on.
Without me.
The thought hits hard enough to knock the air from my lungs.
“Oh God,” I whisper.
I feel wrecked.
Completely wrecked.
“Hey.”
His voice cuts through everything.
Low.
Close.
“Your thoughts are loud, Ezzy. What is it?”
Before I can stop him, he’s turning my chair, pulling me closer so I’m facing him.
Those eyes—those damn blue eyes that always seem to see too much—lock onto mine, sharp and searching.
“Nothing,” I say too quickly.
Then I shake my head.
“I mean, it’s not for now, Benji.”
I force a small smile.
“Maybe we should just have tonight and worry about it tomorrow.”
Make the promise, please, I beg silently.
Even if I don’t know if I can keep it.
“We can talk now—” he starts.
