“Uh, let me see… Because she stayed alone with you in your hut? Because you took her to the beach one day and came back looking and acting like a different man? Because since she disappeared you?—”
“Will you stop doing that?” Ulf snapped. “It is very annoying. I wonder how Asta bears your company.”
“Don’t worry about her, she bears it very well. She loves it, because she loves everything about me.” Rothgar smiled and crossed his arms over his chest. Ulf often wondered who, of the two of them, was the oldest, and never more so than now.
“I don’t think I want to know more, thank you.”
“No. Which is good, as I’m not going to tell you more.” A pause. “So, brother mine. Why don’t you just tell me what you want to tell me? ’Twill be easier, I think.”
Yes. But where to start?
“Ylva is carrying my child,” Ulf blurted out. “That’s what Judith came to tell me, why I had to leave so precipitously. I had no idea, until I saw her…until I saw the babe. She’s already five months gone. And glowing with it. So fucking beautiful.”
There.
He sat down, feeling slightly dazed. Having said the words out loud made it all real. It was happening. He was having a baby with a woman he still wasn’t sure wanted to stay with him. A woman he already knew he would not accept to be parted from ever again.
A hand landed on his shoulder. “How do you feel?”
“Worried she might leave again. Petrified something might go wrong with the babe. Unsure what to do or how to be a father.” He swallowed. “But mainly…ecstatic. Happier than I’ve ever been. Like I’ve finally found what I wanted to do with my life.”
Rothgar nodded, once again looking wise beyond his years. “Exactly as you should feel, I expect. Well, then, congratulations.”
“I thinkHelga has guessed who the father of the baby is,” Ylva told Ulf once they had broken their fast.
The evening before there had been no opportunity for discussion. After a long ride, her body had been clamoring for a rest and the relief of hearing from Helga that all was as it should be had robbed her of what little strength she’d had left. She had barely found the will to eat something before crawling into the pallet Ulf had prepared for her. Had she not immediately fallen into oblivion, she might have asked him to lie with her, but she had fallen asleep before she could voice her wish.
“I had no choice but to tell her when I thought the conception happened,” she carried on, placing another handful of nuts on her wooden plate. By some miracle, she had not been sick yet that morning, even if she did feel nauseous. Perhaps Helga’s brew was responsible for this happy development, or perhaps it was a coincidence. Either way, it was a relief. “And she immediately understood it coincided with the week I spent in the village.”
Ulf nodded slowly. “Of course. She will have drawn the inevitable conclusion. While we are here, I must tell you that Rothgar knows too. He was asking where I’d gone and I…just told him. I hope you don’t mind, but it was too hard to keep the secret to myself. The two of us have always shared everything and I needed to talk to someone.”
Yes, she understood that need all too well. The first thing she had done when she had found out she was going to be a motherhad been to confide in Judith. It made sense he’d wanted to share the news with someone he trusted.
Abandoning the nuts, she stood up and started pacing around the room. “It’s all right. Your family will be the first ones to be told, anyway. They have the right to know.”
Which meant that they had to decide what to do. Did Ulf expect her to come live in his hut, and if so, under what terms? Did he just want to help support the child or did he wish for more? Did he actually want to be with her as man and wife? Perhaps. The way he looked at her seemed to suggest he had feelings for her.
Regardless, people would need to be told sooner or later that he was the father of her child. It might as well be now. Another few days, or even a few weeks, would make no difference. Two people knew already, and she had not even been in the village for a full day. It would be better to be honest. She would hate to create problems or make people think they were hiding something.
Ylva took in a deep breath. “I think we should just?—”
A knock behind her interrupted her. Ulf nodded, indicating she should open the door, seeing as she was closer. Well, that answered part of her question, at least. He considered she was where she was supposed to be and should behave as if this were her home.
It only comforted her in the idea that they should tell everyone what the situation was. After all, there was no shame in it.
The door opened on a tall, slim Saxon man with hair of an unusual shade of brown. Unusual because it was the same as hers. This caused Ylva’s heartbeat to pick up. She had so often been told that the color of her hair was unlike anyone else’s that she couldn’t help but feel some connection to the stranger.
“Good morning. Are you Ylva?” He looked and sounded rather nervous.
“Yes.”
For a reason she couldn’t fathom, her skin started to prickle. She felt Ulf come stand next to her, and she was glad for the support. She had the impression she was going to need it before too long.
“I’m Oslac. Your brother.”
18
Ylva stared at the stranger, her heart beating madly in her suddenly hollowed chest.
