“I thank you, Lady Gillingham. I confess, I found myself a bit nervous. However, once I started to speak, it all seemed to flow just as I intended.”
In response, Dorothea smiled and moved on, leaving Charlotte standing before the curate. She saw such hopeful expectancy in his eyes and again felt remorseful guilt for not having paid more attention. Charlotte took a deep breath, forced a smile, and put her hand out to shake his.
“Yes, I did so enjoy it, Mr. Morton, especially the message of God’s love. I must say you spoke so well. I believe the pastor, Mr. Peabody, can have no reluctance or concerns to ever leave the pulpit in your very capable hands.”
She saw relief flood his countenance and felt him gently squeeze her hand. The touch sent an unusual feeling through her—a bit of a tingle. How odd. Probably just her nerves for fabricating her praise.
Mr. Morton leaned closer and murmured, “Thank you, Miss Kendall. Your approbation was desired by me above all. Perhaps we can discuss my sermon more during Tuesday’s art lesson?”
Cognizant that other parishioners were lined up behind her, waiting to speak to Mr. Morton, Charlotte merely nodded her agreement and moved on. When she joined Dorothea and Reginald, she found Mr. Robert Morton standing with them, chatting easily. He smiled as she approached.
“Ah. Good morning, Miss Kendall. I tried without success to catch your eye and greet you earlier from my pew. Your attention was clearly on higher matters.” He laughed at his own joke. Charlotte, however, did not join in. After an awkward pause, he continued, “I was just discussing with your sister how I hoped to visit Haverstone this afternoon and entice you on a walk around the grounds.”
Again, Charlotte found herself unable to respond. Dorothea jumped in.
“Of course, we should all be delighted to entertain you, Mr. Morton. Shall we say three o’clock? Then, after your stroll, you may join us for tea. I do not wish to brag, but my cook has such an elegant and deft hand with pastries, and I believe she was going to bake some of her special shortbread today. Do join us.”
“Thank you, Lady Gillingham. I look forward with great anticipation to seeing you all this afternoon.” Robert reached for Charlotte’s hand. “Until then, Miss Kendall.” He held her gaze a long moment, then bowed smartly and strode to his coach.
When he was gone, Dorothea turned a stern face toward Charlotte.
“Gracious, I do think you might have been a bit more engaging, my dear,” she said in a harsh whisper. “You barely acknowledged Mr. Morton’s presence. I hope you will show him more consideration when he visits this afternoon.”
“I am not feeling my best, Dorothea. Pray, forgive me,” Charlotte said softly. “I did not sleep well last night.”
Her sister put her arm around Charlotte. “You will feel better once you eat. But, perhaps you should rest a while after luncheon so that you may be in better spirits when Mr. Morton arrives.” She turned to her husband. “Dear, where is our carriage?”
Chapter Twenty
After returning fromchurch, Robert and Frederick were enjoying their luncheon; Frederick was still basking in the glow of the many appreciative comments he had received for his sermon.
“I knowyousaid I spoke well, Robert,” Frederick said, grinning, “although I would hope to expect such praise from my own brother. But, because so many other parishioners were complimentary as well, I suppose I can truly believe that I did well.”
“You did, Freddy,” Robert replied warmly. “I think you chose wisely when you decided to enter the ministry over the military. You may never be wealthy, but your consolation must be this: You have a gift for both writing and oratory matters that will always please your congregants. I am proud of you.”
“Thank you. Are you going riding this afternoon? I thought I heard you order your horse be made ready. Do you wish for some company? I should enjoy an outing with you; it has been some time since we went riding together.”
He saw a rueful smile on Robert’s face.
“I would enjoy that, too, Freddy, but you see, I actually have an appointment. I am riding out to Haverstone to spend some time strolling the gardens with the charming Miss Kendall. I must confess, I find her company quite enjoyable and with each encounter, my admiration for her certainly increases. In fact, I am seriously thinkingof making her an offer of marriage, perhaps at the upcoming ball the Gillinghams are holding.”
Frederick felt as if his stomach had dropped to his boots. He lost his hold of his spoon, which fell into the bowl, splashing soup on the plate and damask linen tablecloth.
“What?” he croaked. “You love Miss Kendall? Robert, I…I am beyond astonishment. Why have you not spoken of this before? I have never heard you utter a word of admiration about her. In fact, I think you once proclaimed your disdain for how Lord and Lady Gillingham were set on making a match with you.”
Robert did not reply right away. When he spoke, his eyes were fixed on his soup rather than on his sibling. He always found it hard to lie to his brother.
“Oh, yes, I did feel that way, initially,” he finally said. “But, our several encounters over this summer have entirely changed my mind. Truly, I find her charming, elegant, intelligent, and everything Brentwood should have in its new mistress.” Robert raised his eyes, and Frederick noted an expression he could not quite make out, but it did not seem to him like the face of a man in love. “Yes,” Robert continued, “I think she will grace the halls of Brentwood every bit as well as our dear mother once did. In truth, I am most eager to make her an offer.”
“But…do you truly love her?” Frederick pressed. He could hardly remain calm. He wanted to yell at his brother that no,hewas in love with Charlotte, and it washewho should propose, not Robert. But, he was struggling to keep his voice from betraying all the emotions racing through him. He watched his brother shrug.
“Love? Naturally, I would not consider marrying someone I amnotin love with, Freddy. But, even putting such lofty, romantic thoughts aside, I am twenty-eight now, and it is high time I married and provided the estate with an heir, do you not agree?” Robert wiped his mouth and tossed the napkin on the table. He rose and smiled. “Now,do keep this all a secret, promise? As I said, I plan to ask for her hand at the Gillingham ball. I feel most confident of her acceptance, too. Well. I have a little estate business to take care of before I ride to Haverstone. I shall see you at dinner.” He walked to the door and turned back to his brother. Now, his countenance seemed to Frederick to show, what—sorrow? Pity? “Again, congratulations on a fine sermon, Frederick. It was well done.” With a nod, he exited.
Frederick sat, letting his soup grow cold; he waved away the footman’s offer of a fresh bowl, his appetite utterly gone. Robert to propose to Miss Kendall? Why had he not noticed his brother’s interest in her? It must have been obvious to everyone. Somehow, he had missed seeing it. Did she return the affection? He desperately thought back to each encounter they had had with the charming young lady, trying to discern any hint that she favored Robert in a particular way. Her teasing ways that he so adored—she had exhibited it toward both of them. No, he could not recall any specific action or statement she had made that might reveal that she favored Robert over…him. Still, his brother would not be ready to propose marriage to Miss Kendall if he did not think she returned his feelings, would he? Sorrow mixed with shame overwhelmed him.
I am a fool. She probably has had her hopes of securing Robert’s affection all this time and was being merely…courteous to me, with no thought of me as a romantic partner. Why did I even dare think she would consider a poor curate to be her future husband when the gentleman of a wealthy estate was available? I have deluded myself all this time. I thought we were so well suited, too, with our shared love of art and reading. But, clearly I misinterpreted her regard for me. Thank heavens, I did not reveal her name as the lady I was thinking of proposing to when I asked Robert for an increase in my wages. Now, he need never know of my feelings. It is clear I am nothing more than a friend and now future brother to Miss Kendall, and I must accept that.
Frederick slowly rose from the table and walked upstairs to his room. A glance at the closed door of Robert’s study indicated a desire for solitude. Frederick knew he should go and wish his brother joy; itwould be the right and proper thing to do. But, oh, his heart ached too much now to be able to congratulate him in a sincere manner.
