Mattie still couldn’t believe what she was hearing. “Ever?”
“Ever.”
“And how old are you?”
“About seven or eight years older than you are.”
She shook her head in awe. “I do not mean to make you feel bad, of course, but I find that astonishing,” she said. “You are so… Surely there are women who have thrown themselves at your feet. I know I would have. I think I did.”
He smiled weakly. “There have been a few.”
“They had good taste,” she said. “But you must understand that other than my fostering, and we were very much kept from the men, my experience in seeing the ways between men and women have mostly been with my brother. He has a different woman every week and the soldiers… Well, you know what soldiers do.”
“I do.”
“And you have never wanted to?”
His smile grew, somewhat nervously. “I am not saying that,” he said. “Ihavewanted to. But the main reason I have not is this—I told you that I had been faithful to our contract and that has been in place for ten years. That is the truth of it. Prior to that, I was a boy. There were not many opportunities for a lad of thirteen or fourteen years to bed a woman, and at that age, it simply wasn’t on my mind, mostly because my father told me that if I bedded a woman and she became pregnant whilst I was betrothed to you, then he would make sure I could never father a child again. I took it to heart.”
She cocked her head. “So it wasn’t so much restraint or loyalty to the contract as it was fear of your father.”
“That is fair.”
She gazed at him for a moment longer before finally breaking into a grin. “Whatever the reason, I have to say that I am quite surprised,” she said. “But I am also pleased. You saved yourself for me.”
“I did.”
“And I saved myself for you.”
“I am grateful.”
“That means we will be learning this together.”
He nodded. “That is true,” he said. “I hope I do not fail you.”
She stood up. “How could you?” she said. “I know basically what to do, for my mother has told me. So has Agnes, who has, unfortunately, not had the same restraint I have had. She has let men… do things to her. She has done things to them and she has told me about it.”
Gar’s eyebrows lifted at the concerning idea of the promiscuous young woman. “I suppose hearing your friend’s stories are better than knowing nothing and coming into this with terror,” he said. “I think the first thing we need to do, however, is disrobe and get into bed. We can proceed from there.”
He stood up from the bed, looking down at her. She was a petite thing, barely coming up to his breastbone. For a moment, they simply gazed at one another, but it wasn’t awkward. There was warmth there, and interest. After a moment, Mattie smiled faintly.
“Since we’ve met, all has been quite formal between us, as it should be,” she said. “But I think, at this point, it should not be quite so formal.”
“Agreed.”
“Would you like to kiss me?”
That was one of the better suggestions he’d heard all day and, without a word, he put his big hands on her upper arms and leaned down, gently slanting his lips over hers. It was just a kiss,something gentle and warm, but it was swift. He stood up to look at her, but her face was upturned to him with her eyes closed.
“Well?” he said. “Like that?”
Her eyes were still closed as she spoke. “I do not think so,” she said, her eyes opening. “My father kisses like that. I do not think I like that.”
He frowned, taking the criticism to heart. “I see,” he said. He cocked his head thoughtfully before lifting his arms again and pulling them around her lush little body. “Mayhap we should do this the right way.”
Mattie gasped as his enormous arms wrapped around her, pulling her up against him. It was as if he’d just struck flint against stone because, suddenly, there was a spark where there hadn’t been before. Her body against his, heat against heat, and she was having trouble breathing as she gazed up at him.
“Aye,” she said, realizing that she was quivering. “This is the right way.”
