“Dance with me.” His eyes move between mine. With a few quick taps on his phone, Bruno’s “Show Me” starts playing.
One side of my mouth tugs upward at him and his smooth ways. I laugh. The way he knows me and just how to ease my anxiety.
He sets his phone on the small table and holds out his hand. I let my head sag to the side, the tension in my body falling away. I take his hand, and he tugs me to him, surrounding me with his arms. I hold onto him, and just like that, we’re swaying.
He presses his lips to my forehead, and I breathe him in.
“I need your help,” I say softly, sliding my arms up his back, but he pulls away.
“You ok?” His brow furrows a little.
I nod. “Yeah.” I tip my chin up to meet his eyes. “I want you to make love to me.”
His eyebrows shoot up, and our movement stalls. He studies me, his eyes moving between mine, searching for confirmation.
“Right now?” His question is soft.
A flipping, swirling sensation flutters low in my stomach, and I bite my lip again. “I didn’t have a specific time set, just, you know, whenever.”
He doesn’t move. “So, right now would be. . .ok?”
I huff out a laugh. “Well, if you want, or we could just—”
“Like, right now, right now?” He clarifies again.
I laugh, letting my head fall to his bare chest.
His arms release me as his hands grip my hips, his fingertips digging in. “Are you sure? Because I’ll—”
“Do you have condoms?”
He smiles. “Yes.”
I lean into him, gliding my hands over his pecs and around his neck. “I want you to kiss me, and I don’t want you to stop. I want to know what it’s like to be with you. Only you.”
His lips press against my temple, and he inhales long and slow. “Ryder, I’m only a man, and I need to be real with you. If we do this, it will be very difficult for me not to want to do it all the time. But this only goes as far as you want. Always. Ok?”
He holds my gaze, making sure I understand.
I press up to my tiptoes and run my lips over the soft skin of his neck. “Ok. I don’t know how this will be, but I want you. I want to replace all of the bad with you and me.”
He bends, his hands gripping the back of my thighs, and lifts me. I wrap my legs around him, trusting him with everything. I know with absolute certainty that if I ask him to stop, he will, and he’ll still be here, loving me. It’s that confidence that makes me sure about this and about him.
He carries me into the bedroom, the soft evening light making the room dim. He releases my legs, and I stand at the edge of the bed. His hands slip into my hair, and he kisses me softly and slowly, easing us into this.
“You have no idea how badly I want this with you, but I’ll wait. I want you to be one hundred percent ready.”
I stare into his eyes, seeing the kind of love I never knew existed or thought could be extended to me. “I want this with you. . .so much.”
His mouth lands on mine, careful but sure. He angles my head, and his tongue sweeps across my lips. I reciprocate, kissing him, tasting him, and wanting to explore and know every part of him.
I bite his lip, and he groans. His hands glide over my body, landing on my butt, fisting the cotton fabric of his shirt.
“I thought this was a new way of testing my will.” He kisses me, his hands sliding underneath and gliding up my sides. He takes his sweet time, and I’m learning it’s pure torture of the best kind. “I like you in my sweatshirts, but you in only my shirt, and your bare-toned legs might’ve killed me.”
I smile, layering kisses over his shoulder.
His fingers grip the hem of his shirt. “May I?”
