There’s a second where we hold our breath.
“It’s—you have that huge hole in your balcony, and I can’t imagine it’s very warm,” I clarify.
He chuckles and holds my hands, rubbing soft circles on them. “What’s the real reason?”
I blush. “That’s one of many.”
“All right, then.” He smiles. “I’ll take my siblings home, we’ll pack, and meet you at the end of your shift.”
“Okay.”
Summoning every ounce of bravery in me, I reach up and kiss his cheek. He freezes, breath catching in his throat. He stutters a goodbye and heads toward the door before glancing back at me.
“See you later.”
“See you.”
Khawf is waiting for me in the stockroom, and I jump when I see him.
“Didn’t expect me on this joyous day?” His lips twist in displeasure.
I close the door, sighing. “And why are you upset now? Kenan being my husband gives me more motivation to leave with him.”
He nods. “That’s true, but it doesn’t come without risks.”
“How do you mean?”
He steps closer. “If—God forbid, of course—Kenan or his siblings were killed or, worse, arrested. You’d still leave?”
Dread slithers in my stomach.
“A lot could happen in five days,” Khawf continues matter-of-factly. “Who will you choose? Layla or Kenan?” His eyes gleam. “Or yourself?”
I clear my throat. “I’m leaving my brother, aren’t I?”
He taps his chin. “Right. But will another tragedy make you break your promise? Make you want to die here rather than take a risk at life?”
“No,” I answer.
He steps toward me. His breath is cold, but there’s worry in his eyes. “I hope for your sake you don’t. It would be a shame to bury you here.”
KHAWF’S WORDS WEIGH HEAVILY ON ME THROUGHOUTthe day. My heart is at war, trying to latch on to wisps of happiness. Hope is a ghost roaming my body.
The occasional person congratulates me as I go on with my rounds. Glimmers of joy spark briefly, but it’s like trying to hold on to fog. Nour hugs me tightly again, and I try to absorb her delight.
“I knew he liked you!” Nour exclaims, walking beside me.
“You did?”
“Yes. He always looks at you while you work. Not in a creepy way… I don’t know,” she says thoughtfully. “Like you’re the only one who exists.”
I blush. “Oh. I didn’t think anyone saw that.”
“It’s been a nice distraction from all the patients running in constantly. I mean it’s a miracle we have our wits!”
“You know, in the West and other places where people have normal lives, the medical staff can get therapy for what they see while dealing with their patients.”
“What a strange word! How do you pronounce it?The-ra-pee?” she asks sarcastically.
