He never stopped taking me out on the ice. It’s where he told me my mom had cancer. It’s where he brought me to share that she was in remission. It’s where I told him about Avery and where the two of us had our biggest blowout. The day I informed him that I was getting married. And it’s where he helped me figure out how my life was going to work after I became a father.
Honestly, I could really use a shift on the ice with him right about now. I could use his input about what the hell happens next. I know what I want. Fuck, I don’t remember a time in my life when I haven’t wanted this—her—but she’s right. It’s not fair of me to ask her to pause her life while I figure out my own.
And in our current situations, yeah, we can’t be together.
She’s barely spoken to mesince she gave me that hard truth on the roof. While we’re at the arena, she keeps things professional; she doesn’t ice me out. But she hasn’t joined us for a single family dinner since that night. She’s always conveniently busy with Savannah or Josie. I’m pretty sure she’s even been sleeping at Savannah’s.
But she makes sure to say good night to my girl every evening. Shetexts, letting me know she’s ready for Avery’s call, and the two of them talk on the phone while I strain to listen to her side of the conversation. I’m on the outside, but I’m nothing but grateful, because if I can’t have Adeline in the way I want her, at least my daughter can have her in the way she needs her.
But Adeline has always been good at showing up for those who need her, me included.
“Thirty years and counting,” Gavin says with a laugh. “It’s good for these old guys.”
He smacks Uncle Garreth on the back.
Garreth, who’s quiet and a little broody most of the time, glares in response. “I’m two years older than you.”
“And we”—Aiden points to himself, then Brooks—“definitely weren’t playing with you thirty years ago.”
“Jesus,” Gavin mutters. “Everyone’s so fucking sensitive.”
“Ducking,” Beckett grumbles.
“There’s not a fucking child in a mile radius.” My dad pins me with a look. “Please tell me you aren’t using that stupid word now that you’re living in the brownstone.”
Beckett nudges him in the ribs, and he bends at the waist dramatically, groaning.
“What are you doing here?” Brooks asks me, ignoring their antics.
“Just working off some steam.”
“Wanna join us?” Beckett asks.
Gavin glares at his older brother. “He’s got a game tomorrow.”
Taking a step back, I hold up my hands. “I’m not trying to play with you old men.”
My dad laughs. “Why you working off steam? Something you want to talk about?”
I glance at Beckett, then each of his brothers, then huff. What the fuck do I have to lose? Brayden tells me I’m out of my mind. Finn thinks I’m being absurd. But there’s no way Beckett isn’t concerned about Adeline going on dates with a bunch of strange men.
I run my hands through my hair, grimacing. “I’m nervous about Adeline’s date tonight.”
Every single eye widens. Not one of them expected that. Iguarantee it. Maybe I’ve danced around my feelings with my dad, and I all but told Beckett about them years ago, but the rest of these men haven’t pushed me into admitting something I never could.
That Adeline Langfield has always been the only woman I want.
Even when I married someone else.
Admitting that to myself is a step in the right direction. For so long I was so goddamn mad at her that I refused to admit my marriage was a reaction to my anger.
Even if I’ve always sworn I did it for Avery. So I wouldn’t have to split custody, so I could always be with my little girl.
That was a perk, sure, but I never would have married Tabitha if Adeline hadn’t hurt me so deeply.
Fuck, I’m an idiot.
“Why are you nervous about it?” Dad is the first to risk asking the question.
