I’m here, Stella. I’m here, but I think you know…
“You can’t stay.” I feel her hug me. I feel her hug me and my heart bursts in bloom.
I can’t stay.
CHAPTER FIFTY-SIX
I sleep feverishly throughout the next day. When I finally feel well enough to sit and eat, I’ve lost an entire twenty-four hours. William tells me that his private security guard “handled” both Elizabeth and Reverend Jenkins. I don’t know if I’ll see the reverend again. I don’t know that I care. I’m a bit befuddled by it all.
“Those two,” William says.“Ej bekot!”He tosses back the rest of his brandy and squeezes my hand. “I knew I could believe in you.” He heads to bed. To bed, just as I’m waking.
I check Nirav’s cut. It’s deep—you can see his collarbone, which causes his breath to sizzle through his teeth when I touch it. William’s friend Robert has cleaned it and bandaged it, and I promise a visit to the doctor for us both. “We can afforda doctor,” I whisper to Nirav, and we giggle. He stumbles to bed, too.
“Are you tired?” Pax asks when at last we’re alone.
“Not in the least.”
We settle into deep, leather chairs, and Pax brings me a lush red wine, so velvety it’s like sipping silk.
“You’re still here.” I realize as I’m saying it, this observation is for both Daisy and Pax. That both of them have seen me at my very worst, and both of them still love me. It’s astounding.
And Pax answers for both of them: “I am. But I can’t stay long.” He sighs.
“You’re really leaving?”
Pax looks at the wine swirling in his glass. “I have to. My brother, Gavrilo—”
Spirit flashes me the same images as when I met Gavrilo at Blanck’s party. Soldiers. Bodies. Bullets. War. I cringe.
Pax’s silver-green eyes take on a faraway look. “My brother Gavrilo is involved in something big. Something menacing. I can feel it. I have to try to stop him. Gavrilo is ruthless. And… he took that gun.”
Pax is worried he might not come home, Stella.
Tears sting my eyes. “I understand. But, you’ll be back, right? And then we can—”
I trail off. We can what? We’ve never discussed anything outside of Julia’s Bureau. We, in fact, discussed parting ways after Blanck’s party.
I inhale. It does little to tamp down my burning embarrassment. But I’m his lovely thief. A merry bandit. His partner.
Pax pats his knees. “I almost forgot. I got you something.”
My heart thrills. A gift! I haven’t received a gift in years.
He pulls a small, shiny bauble from his vest pocket. He leans forward and pins it on my dress.
A diamond brooch. A simple circle of gleaming gems. Beautiful, breathtaking.
“To fill those pinholes,” he says with a smile. “The ones I noticed—”
“—in the restaurant. I remember.” I touch the circle, think of infinity.
“Filling the holes in your heart.” He’s not looking at me as he says it. “Or maybe just above it.” He rubs my knuckles with his fingertip.
“You worked all day to come up with that, didn’t you.”
“I did. It was either that orI’m running around in circles over you.”
“Hmm.”
