They have to walk two blocks to Simone’s car, and during those two blocks Mae starts at least a dozen sentences.
“You guys, it wasn’t—”
“I was only—”
“It’s just because—”
Natalie and Jordan walk ahead of her. They don’t want to hear anything Mae tries to say. When they’re in the car, with Simone in the driver’s seat, Jordan beside her, and Natalie and Mae in the back, Jordan turns around and says, “So, you were at the wedding?” Classic Jordan—she wants the answer, but on her own time. Simone, to her credit, simply drives. The streets are dark, mostly quiet; the moon is full. The water, in glimpses behind the rock walls, glows.
“I got invited, so I went.”
“We all got invited,” says Natalie. “We agreed as a group to boycott.”
Mae inhales, exhales on the answer. “I changed my mind. I called Dad and told him I wanted to go. He bought me a plane ticket, and I went.” She can hear the uncertainty in her voice, and she doesn’t like it.
Natalie says, “This is unbelievable. And you didn’t tell us?”
“I didn’t tell you because you would have reacted exactly the way you’re reacting now.”
Natalie snorts. It’s the snort that gets to Mae. “You know what? I don’t have to explain. I don’t have to apologize.”
“Yes, you do,” says Jordan. “You have to do both.”
Even Mae doesn’t recognize the steeliness in her own voice. “I don’t. I think Kara isnice.Ilikeher. I think you’re both too hard on Dad and Kara, okay?”Each emphasized word feels like she’s delivering a punch.
“We’re not hard enough,” says Natalie.
“I miss Mom as much as you guys do—”
“Apparently not,” says Jordan, under her breath, but still Mae hears her, and is infuriated. She tries to hold her voice steady.
“Of course I do. You know I do. But I think Kara isgoodfor Dad. And Dad is good for Kara. If you took even a second to get out of your own heads and get to know her you’d see that too. You’re not eventrying.”
“I don’t want to get to know her,” says Jordan.
“Me either,” says Natalie.
“Well, who cares? Whocareswhat you want? This is not aboutyou.” They both stare at her, at this person with a very un-Mae-like tone of voice, these harsh words.
Then she softens. “I wanted to go to the wedding. Iwantedto go. I wanted us all to go, but I knew you wouldn’t. I was happy to be there.” She pauses and then says, “It was a really nice wedding. I’m not sorry I was there. I was lonely, and I felt less lonely being there.”
In the moonlight she sees something shift in Jordan’s posture.
Simone clears her throat and they all startle, as though they’ve forgotten about her, as though they thought they were being transported by a driverless car. “If I may,” she says. “I know this conversation is none of my business, but I just want to say, you guys had an amazing mom.”
A great silence falls. Mae is the first to speak.
“Yeah,” she says.
“Yeah,” says Jordan.
“We did,” says Natalie.
“I know that.Youknow that. But tell me about her as though I’d never met her.”
“Now?” asks Jordan.
“Here?” asks Mae, glancing at Natalie.
