It should have been a bigger adjustment to be awake during daytime hours and asleep when the rest of the world was. Thenagain, I wasn’t able to sleep during the day, even when I was the thing that wentbumpin the night.
I hadn’t slept well in years, but when I was nearher,I wanted to close my eyes and breathe deeply. I wanted to sink into the abyss of peaceful bliss.
But that’s exactly why I couldn’t.
I couldn’t get complacent. I couldn’t let my guard down.
I couldn’t risk her life because the craving for companionship I had shoved away time and time again had reared its head and mesmerized me with hypnotic eyes the color of blue jays, clear skies, and still waters.
I couldn’t have her, but I could do this for her. Something small. Something to make it a little easier.
The safe house was safe because it was in one of the most remote parts of the Monongahela National Forest. The downside was that it took forever to get to the nearest town that was big enough to have more than one store option. Even taking the shortcuts and back roads that shaved off some time, it was a slow, lumbering drive. And that was if the ground was dry. If it had rained, the chance of getting stuck was too great.
I took advantage of the daylight, scouting out the route for any signs that someone else had been nearby.
But there was nothing.
Just deer.
A little family of bears.
And nothing else.
It should have given me some peace of mind. Cole and I had secured this place in the event that the worst possible scenario happened. We had planned for every need. Every safety measure. But I didn’t like sitting in one place for too long. It made me antsy and anxious.
Then I thought about her.
The way her nose wrinkled at the thought of the outdoors. The way her bare feet hardly made a sound as she tiptoed across the cabin, trying to be as unintrusive as possible.
I thought about the way I sank into that couch and how my heart slowed as I watched her pace, trying to figure out what my name was.
And I had told her what it was because I was a lovestruck idiot.
All my training went out the window. Every cover story I had prepared because I worked for Valentine. All the lies I could have told her.
I told her my name because I wanted her to know who I was. For once, I didn’t want to be the shadow. I wanted to be the sun.
Undeniable. Unmistakable. Life-giving.
I wanted Amelia to seeme.
Wanting her was a reckless desire.
The forest opened up and spat me onto a two-lane road. It led into a small town that sported a fast-food burger joint, a gas station, a small grocer, a farm and hardware store, the thrift shop I had been in yesterday, a used bookstore, and a Dollar General.
Because of course there was a Dollar General in the middle of fucking nowhere.
I backed into an open spot—just in case I needed to make a quick escape—and slipped into the Dollar General first, keeping my head down as I snagged a few things on my list.
The used bookstore was next. I didn’t know what Amelia was into, so I got a little of everything. And a dictionary, simply because she was a smartass.
I cracked a smile at the thought of her comment yesterday. Maybe I’d stick a bookmark on the page with the definition of “never.”
Never been kissed . . .
Frankly, I thought I had just done a shit job at digging up dirt on her previous partners. Butnever? She was a fucking catch. Gorgeous, smart, funny, witty. The two of us had only known each other for a bit under two weeks, but it felt like a lifetime.
Surely that was the lingering exhaustion talking.
