“You’re so facetious.”
“I’m not being facetious.”
“Ryan—”
He reached into the backseat to grab his pillow and folded it over like I had. “I like you, Willow. And God help me, sometimes I don’t know why. I liked you from the minute you rounded the corner back at that little store and ran into me.”
“You’re just saying that because you think it’s going to get me to fall in love with you so you can win.”
Ryan wedged the pillow into the corner of the seat and the door. “I can’t control how you feel about me. But I hope you let me fall in love with you. Because I really fucking want to.”
10
RYAN
THE ART OF WAR
Of three things, I was certain.
1. Southern Illinois was the most boring part of the country to drive through.
2. Willow had awful taste in music.
3. I was in love with her.
Thankfully, I had been able to sleep most of the way from Honey Hollow to Louisville, Kentucky. Willow was a beast at long stretches of driving and didn’t look the least bit winded after seven and a half hours of mountain roads.
Unfortunately, that’s when the music started.
She had been listening to an audiobook with a single earbud in while I was asleep, but as soon as I sat up, she queued up the boy bands.
We made it to Louisville and swapped seats after a pit stop to eat, caffeinate, and take bathroom breaks.
I immediately put a stop to her playlist. She protested for a solid ten minutes before popping her earbuds back in and leaving me to my Billy Joel.
The peace didn’t last long enough for us to even get out of Illinois.
“You said we had sex?!” Willow shrieked as she ripped out her headphones. “Ryan—I don’t know your middle name—Ford, what the hell is wrong with you?!”
I turned down the volume and glanced at her. “Wanna loop me in?”
Willow flashed her phone screen at me. I didn’t take my eyes off the road for long, just a split second to see the cover photo for the Leading Man podcast.
My podcast.
“Aww, I’m touched, cupcake,” I teased with a grin. “Thanks for your enthusiastic support.”
Willow growled as she looped the podcast through the car’s speaker system and hit play.
“Look, man. All I’m saying is that you gotta take your time. Stop rushing into things. Your goal shouldn’t be one night. It should be all of them. If you’re just looking for a hook-up, then my programs aren’t for you. This isn’t amateur hour, bro. Now, when I’m with my lady, I make it all about her. Like life, sex isn’t fifty-fifty. You’ve gotta take turns giving each other the entirety of your attention. If she doesn’t get your entire attention, she’s not going to give you hers. You’ve gotta stop treating it like a race where you’re both running at the same time. That’s not teamwork. That’s competition, and you’ll always be keeping score against each other. Long-term relationships are a relay. You’re running with the baton, then you hand it off while she runs. You cheer each other on and get ready for it to be your turn again.
“Now, you asked about sex. Good sex doesn’t require a big dick. I mean—it doesn’t hurt. You’ve just gotta know how to use what you’ve got. Thankfully, I have a big dickandknow how to use it. I have a very satisfying sex life, but I’m not qualified to give advice on your sex life. So head over to my website and click the resource tab. You’ll find linkstovetted professionalswho can help you navigate the specific frustrations you and your partner are experiencing. Thanks for calling in. We’ll get to the next call after this message from our sponsors.”
I remembered that call. The guy had been annoyed because his partner wouldn’t put out. Sometimes I could help with those particular calls. Nine times out of ten, it wasn’t a sex issue. It was a lifestyle issue. One party was exhausted because they were carrying a heavy mental load. It was a partner not feeling seen, heard, or emotionally safe. Even in long-term relationships, the need for emotional reassurance is just as great as the need for physical connection.
Willow hit pause as the ad spot came on, accompanied by some cheery theme music. “What the hell, Ford?” she hissed.
“I thought it was a decent way to handle it,” I said. “I made sure he knew he had to put in effort beyond the bedroom, and then handed him off to some pros.”
