My thighs were trembling when I made it to Willow’s floor. I pushed through the stairwell door and glanced at the room numbers, counting my way to her.
I didn’t stop to breathe and collect myself. I pounded on the door until the handle lowered.
And then I was kissing her. Willow squeaked in surprise as she wrapped her arms around my neck and dragged me inside.
She broke away first, sandwiching my cheeks in her hands. “What took you so long?”
“Cab got stuck in traffic. Ran the rest of the way here.”
Her brows lifted. “You jumped out of a cab and ran here?”
“You know me. I’m all about the weather. It was a nice day, so I thought I’d chase down my future wife before she got away from me again.”
She laughed before coming in for another kiss. It was softer and sweeter than the first. “You gave me the romance movie cliché.”
I kicked the door closed and walked her backward toward the bed, tossing the book on it first. “How’d you pull all this off, cupcake?”
Willow beamed. “Your mom helped. She’s a romantic.”
I laid her back on the bed and rested my forehead on hers. “What took you so fucking long?”
She tilted her chin up, bumping my nose with hers. “I’ve been a little busy trying to love you the way you love me.”
FROM SHEP
To my loving daughter,
One of the hardest things to do in life is say you’re sorry. Humans have become too fearful of the word, when it should be in our everyday vocabulary. Folks have become far too litigious, chasing apologies away and making it seem like, if we dare to apologize and admit fault and wrongdoing, that we’re weak and we’ll lose some imaginary standing.
I think it’s the opposite.
I think it takes a strong person to admit when they’re wrong. It takes wisdom and self-reflection to admit that you can do better, and that you will.
If someone is seeking the high ground in a relationship, you’re sure to fail. There are no winners in relationships. Only losers.
Apologizing doesn’t make you the loser. Apologizing is reaching for your partner, and admitting that you need help and guidance to find your footing again.
Love requires humility. And when you love the right person, you won’t be afraid to say you’re sorry because you know that your vulnerability will be protected.
Likewise, your partner should not be afraid to say they’re sorry to you. Welcome that self-awareness. Honor the courage that it takes to admit fault. Then, try again tomorrow to make the next day better than the last.
Love,
Dad
38
AUTUMN
LITTLE FLAMES AND DANGEROUS THINGS
“I’ve been a little busy trying to love you the way you love me.”
Ryan’s eyes widened. “Wills . . .”
I closed my eyes as he braced himself over me and tucked his head in the crook of my neck. “I’m sorry I didn’t try harder before.”
“I’m sorry I didn’t give you a chance to,” he said as he kissed his way up my neck. “I was so afraid of you walking away that I didn’t give you a chance to walk with me. I made it too easy for you to leave when things got hard because you weren’t in it in the first place.” He kissed behind my ear, making me shiver as he inhaled deeply. “I missed you so fucking much. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about Shep as soon as I found out.” He kissed my temple, then my forehead. “I was trying to control the moment too much instead of just talking it out.”
