She looked down, away from his face, and took a shuddering breath. It didn’t inspire a ton of confidence, but he had to know what he was getting here. Was this just a night? Or was it all of her?
He wanted everything, but he knew he would settle for less. He just needed to have an idea of where he stood.
CHAPTERTWENTY-SEVEN
Grace closedher eyes for a moment. Fear seemed to rush through her veins. She wanted to tell him the truth, but what was the truth? She’d stayed away for Alma’s sake, but also for her own. She didn’t want to hurt again. She didn’t want to have to rebuild a whole new life if all of this went to pieces. She didn’t want to be vulnerable anymore. She didn’t want more pain. But now that Alma had rescinded her objections to Grace’s relationship with Rafael, it seemed like every other concern was falling by the wayside. If she had Alma’s support, she knew she could get through anything. She’d done it before. And maybe it was still risky, but Grace felt a strength she hadn’t in the past. She knew Gram would have wanted her to take a risk, because it was what she’d encouraged Grace to do her entire life—to move downtown, to study art, to find what she loved and hold onto it. Even if Rafael’s feelings for her were something abstract, something she was never able to pin down and hold in her hands, that didn’t make them any less real, and it didn’t mean they would disappear.
Rafael had asked her a straightforward question, and in that moment, she knew the answer. No matter what else was holding her back, all her worries and fears and brokenness from before, she knew. “Yes,” she breathed.
He moved closer to her in an instant, as if that was all he needed to hear. He brought his hands to the sides of her face, inching his lips closer to hers. “This is what I want,” he said. “Youare what I want.”
One of his hands slid to the back of her neck, and he kissed her again. God, she’d been waiting for that for ages, but it felt even better than she’d imagined—to have him kiss her again, desire radiating from him in waves.
Rafael broke the kiss and exhaled sharply as he pressed his forehead against hers. “Come to bed,” he said, his voice deep with want.
Grace nodded, which was hard with her forehead pressed to his, but not impossible. She found herself smiling.
There were times over the past several months when she’d thought she would never be happy again, when she was sure she had lost herself, and there was no way to get that person back. She didn’t think she’d be able to find a moment of peace from the constant grief that rolled through her, the knowledge that her true family was gone, and nothing would ever be the same.
But Rafael had shown her it was possible. Even though the sadness would live inside her forever, a hard little kernel of pain deep in her chest, she could still find a way back to herself. She could still find happiness, too, on occasion. She knew that because of him, because as he took her hand and led her to his bed, his fingers interlaced with hers, she was happy.
When they got to his bedroom, he kissed her slowly, like they had all the time in the world. There was no Alma to walk in on them this time. There seemed to be no one else in the world. Rafael left the door to his bedroom wide open as he pushed Grace toward the bed. He kissed and sucked the side of Grace’s neck. He took his time trailing his fingers up the skin of her back, pressing her close against him.
They stayed that way for a long time, lying on the bed making out, slowly exploring each other. Grace ran her palm along his abs, delighting in how firm he was. This beautiful, incomparable human specimen wanted her. She bit at his bottom lip with her teeth, letting that knowledge sink in and fuel her desire even further. She’d never even dared to imagine it before—that he might want her as much as she wanted him.
Slowly, Rafael stripped her bare and splayed her across the white sheets. Grace watched as he kneeled over her, tugging off his shirt. She could see his arousal pressed against his slacks, and it only made her heart pound harder. She would never get enough of him. She hungered for him in a way she never had anyone else before. Thewantspread through her so easily, so constantly. She pulled him toward her and hitched a leg around his. He brought his mouth to her breast, teasing her with his tongue. Her fingers wove through his hair. “Rafael,” she whispered, overwhelming need pulsing between her legs. He slid a hand down her soft belly and then lower, until he was almost to the place she wanted him most. She wriggled beneath him, trying to get his hand to move down farther.
“What do you want Graciela?” he whispered.
“Touch me,” she said.
“Where?”
She arched toward him, and finally his fingertips pressed against her in just the right position. “There,” she said. “Everywhere.”
He did just as she had asked, and Grace gasped with pleasure.
It felt so good, but Grace still wasn’t satisfied. It still wasn’t enough of him. She reached out, sliding a hand up his thigh before she ripped open the button on his pants and reached for his length, letting out a breath as he continued to touch her.
“You don’t have to be quiet this time,” he said. “This time I want to hear every sound you make.” He kissed her again, and she hummed against his mouth. He wriggled to work his pants lower, until finally he reached down and yanked them over his feet. Then he spread her legs wider.
Grace pushed against him, hauling her weight up and rolling them until she was on top of him. She bit her lip as she felt his erection press right between her legs. She leaned against him and kissed him harder as his hands roamed her back, then tangled up in her hair.
“I want you so badly,” he said.
“You can have me,” she said, grabbing him.
“You’re sure about that? I don’t just want tonight. I want all of you, Graciela.”
She nodded but had no words. Instead, she leaned back and guided him inside of her. Rafael pressed his fingertips into her hips, and Grace shuddered, enjoying the feel of him all over.
They moved together in the dark, both of them moaning and letting out shallow breaths, both of them desperate and reckless.
If Grace would have been able to think, she might have been awestruck by how comfortable she felt with him, even though everything was wild and exciting and new, it still felt like they were intimate friends, like they knew and trusted each other. As it was, however, Grace could barely put two words together, and when she managed that, all she was able to say was, “holy shit.”
Grace rolled her hips, taking Raf even deeper, and every time she pulled back, their bodies snapped back together in the middle like magnets. Raf’s grunts became more fevered as he lost himself in her, and Grace relished every moment of it. She felt so sexy and powerful. She felt desired like never before.
It was enough to send her over the edge with a breathless laugh. Her entire body seemed to spasm before she bent forward over Rafael, touching her breasts to his chest and kissing him fiercely as he followed her into oblivion, groaning her name and continuing to thrust into her while he rode out his own orgasm. Then he laughed, too, and he sounded sohappy, it made Grace’s heart turn to mush. How was it possible that she’d been with Derek for three years and never felt like this a day in her life? She’d been entirely comfortable with him but also too complacent. They’d often felt more like roommates than lovers, boring and bland and distant. And yet, she and Rafael had started out that way—as roommates—but the word had never seemed to fit. There’d always been something more, something so far from boring and complacent, something comfortable and untamed all at the same time. How was it possible that this snobbish playboy, a man she’d completely written off ten years ago, could envelop her in this completely sexy, delicious emotional tornado?
