Olivia
Ican’t believe Alexis about to let me tie him up. That’s the only thought that’s circling in my head as we climb up the stairs to what is quickly becomingourroom.
When the idea first popped into my head, my only goal was to wipe that half-scared, half-disgusted look off his face. And while the thought of having him tied up and at my mercy is hot as hell, I didn’t expect him to accept it so easily. Or for him to find it as hot as I do.
However, as we step into the room, nerves set in, causing my stomach to coil itself into knots. I want Alex to enjoy this, to let himself go and not have to worry about hurting me.
Not that I think he would without the ropes.
But now that the hotness of the idea has faded a little, I’m worried I’ll fuck this up. I’ve never been the dominant one in the bedroom.Never had the urge to. So going from being the more submissive one to suddenly tying a guy up to have my way with him is intimidating as fuck.
And we still have to work out our safe words.
Just the thought has my stomach coiling tighter. Safe words make it sound like whatever we’re doing could be potentially dangerous. What if I mess up and hurt Alex? Or don’t hear his safe word when he uses it? Oh God, what if I traumatise him and he never wants to have sex with me again?
Hands land heavily on my shoulders, jarring my spiralling thoughts from my head. I blink and glance up to see Alex gazing down at me, his brow furrowed with concern.
“I can see you freaking out, sweetheart,” he says as one of his hands cups the side of my face. “Just breathe for me a little.” He sucks in an exaggerated breath, and I follow suit, letting it out when he does.
With each breath, the jagged edges of my panic and fear smooth out until I’m able to think clearly. The knots in my stomach, while still there, loosen a little, and I relax into his hold.
“Good girl.” Alex leans down and presses a kiss to my forehead. “We don’t have to do this if you don’t want to. Just because you like the idea doesn’t mean you’ll enjoy the reality of it, and that’s okay.”
“It’s not that,” I say with a shake of my head.
“Then what is it?”
“I don’t want to fuck up or hurt you.” It sounds silly saying it out loud, especially considering the size difference between us, but fear isn’t rational. Especially when it comes to those we love.
But Alex doesn’t laugh. He just nods, his expression thoughtful. “How do you think you could hurt me?”
“I don’t know. Maybe not hear your safe word or something and keep going. Or do something that you don’t like or is wrong.” I bite my tongue to stop the verbal stream pouring from my mouth.
“That’s why you have me here, princess,” Rhys says behind me, causing me to startle because I didn’t hear him come up.
I glance over my shoulder as he places a black bag on the floor and strides over to me.
“Those concerns you have are valid ones to have. I’m pretty sure every Dominant and top has had them at some point in their life.”
“Even you?” The idea of Rhys—strong, confident Rhys—being scared or nervous about failing as a Dominant is so foreign to me.
He nods. “Yes, even me. But you’re being smart and mitigating that risk by asking me to be present.” He cups the back of my head, forcing me to keep looking at him as Alex shuffles to the side to let him move closer. “I’ll make sure that there’s no chance of you putting yourself or Alex at risk or missing a safe word. I promise.”
Hearing that, some of the tension drains from my shoulders and I deflate with a sigh.
“Speaking of which, have you two decided on safe words?” he asks as he glances between us.
“Not yet. I think both of us are a little nervous about what’s going to happen,” Alex says.
Rhys nods. “Alright. How about we keep it simple and stick with the traffic light system? Red means stop, yellow means slow down, and green means you’re happy to keep going. If I ask for a colour, you give me a colour depending on how you’re doing. Understand?”
We both nod, but that’s not enough for Rhys.
“Verbalconsent, please.”
“I understand,” I say, too nervous to argue back.
“Didn’t realise you were domming me, too,” Alex huffs. “Yeah, I got it.”
