“Okay,” Ben said a minute later, the easygoing tone returning to his voice in a rather obvious but merciful way. “Is it a good book so far?”
Alexei’s muscles relaxed. He looked again at the worn cover ofAlanna: The First Adventure.
“It’s actually one of my favorites from when I was a kid. I’ve already probably read it twenty times.”
Alexei still wasn’t sure if it was a silly choice, bringing a nostalgic favorite instead of something new. But the Tamora Pierce paperback was small and light, and he had thought it might be a tiny comfort for nights when he was feeling lonely.
“Tell me about it.”
Alexei glanced again at Ben. He was still on his side facing Alexei, but had let his head drop back onto his sweatshirt-pillow. He looked snuggled in, ready for a bedtime story, even though it was the middle of the day.
“It’s silly,” Alexei said, feeling self-conscious. “It’s for, like…middle schoolers.”
“Perfect. I didn’t read jackshit in middle school. It’ll be an education.”
Alexei laughed.
“Seriously, what’s it about?”
“Well, so. It’s Tamora Pierce’s first book.”
“You say that like I should know who Tamora Pierce is.”
Alexei gave Ben a look. “You should.”
Ben smiled. “Right.”
“She’s an epic fantasy writer, and this book was the first in theSong of the Lionessquartet—”
“Quartet!”
Alexei frowned. Ben looked utterly delighted.
“I’ve just never heard anyone use that word so casually in a sentence before.”
“It means there were four books in the series. It’s not that strange.”
“Of course. Please, continue.”
Alexei, for perhaps the first time since they’d met, felt like scowling at Ben. But Ben was smiling so wide, Alexei also sort of wanted to kiss him.
He focused back on the book.
“It was readers’ first introduction to Tortall, the universe where a lot of her books take place. And…I don’t know, I loved it when I was twelve. And—”
Alexei chewed on his lip. How much did Ben really want to know about Tamora Pierce?
But he’d said he was bored. He appeared interested. And Alexei wanted Alexei 2.0 to be comfortable talking about these things. To do more than just come out. To talk about these parts of him, out loud, when he could find the courage.
“I mentioned yesterday that I play D&D?”
“Yeah.”
“It’s super nerdy, I know. But I like it because it reminds me of these kinds of books that I loved so much as a kid. They always let me escape the world for a while. And during a D&D session a while ago, some of the other people in my group started talking about Tamora Pierce. About Alanna, the main character of this book, in particular.” He paused. Took a deep breath. “They called her a queer icon.”
“Yeah?” Ben was still smiling. “Tell me more.”
“She’s this girl who pretends to be her brother, Thom, so she can live her dream of becoming a knight. Thom never wanted to be a knight anyway, so he’s, like, sure, you be a boy, and I’ll run away to be a magician, and we’ll both be happy.”
