I don’t turn around, instead I give myself a moment to find composure. If I turned, I would give away all that I want to keep hidden. What do I fear? Losing her? What are we doing? What will happen? The dark of the endless oceans, alone and never seeing anyone but those we must kill. Slavery. A life of penance for crimes we did not commit.
“I fear a life of emptiness,” I say quietly. “I fear living in the oceans so long that my body degrades, and I become nothing but sea foam, forgotten to all who love me.”
Her touch on my back is tentative, hesitant. We did that to her. Put that hesitance and caution in her.
She was so fearless.
Her breath huffs out, light and uncertain, bringing that blackberry scent to cloud around and impede my senses. Unlike how she used to be. She relaxes, becoming comfortable around me when she shouldn’t. She should hate me, rail at me, hurt me.
Her hand drops to my leg and gets firmer, more confident, and she moves into my space.
“You would never become nothing, Canto. You’d become a song that people hear in that moment before a storm is born. In the intensity just before something amazing happens. The world wouldn’t forget you. You are the place between worlds now.”
I huff and pull her between my legs and rest my forehead on her shoulder.
“I don’t deserve your generosity,” I admit harshly.
Her arms come up to encircle my neck.
“I don’t want to grieve you again.”
My throat thickens, and a tear rolls down my cheek. I never cry. I didn’t when they imprisoned me. Even when we were in the ocean, nor when we watched the world burn.
But saying goodbye to this omega…it’s breaking my heart. Something I wasn’t sure I had.
“So, don’t grieve us. Remember every good memory. Celebrate it and pretend we are with you. Make it so that we are together. Always.”
She clings to me tighter.
“Mei, please, I’m trying.”
“I can’t cry, Canto,” she says at last.
She can’t cry tears, but I can hear her song, and it’s the most intense and sad sound I’ve ever heard. Her scent is barely there.
I stroke my hand down her hair, over and over.
“You are brave and good and kind. An omega who can achieve anything she wants. A healer who does amazing feats. You have changed me, and for the better. I will think of you all the time. I will remember these moments, and I will wish I was with you.”
Her arms tighten.
I open my eyes and see Ronit standing in the door frame. Lirin is crouched on the ground, tears pouring down his cheeks. Brioswallows hard, but his eyes are shiny, while Reed looks ready to fight us all.
“No,” he hisses.
I raise an eyebrow.
“You don’t give up on us, because we won’t give up on you. I promise, if it takes me all of my life, I’m going to find a way back to you, Mei,” Reed snarls defiantly.
“Reed,” Ronit admonishes.
“No, you shouldn’t give up. We should not give up. This will not be goodbye. I won’t allow it!” Reed roars.
Mei has pulled free and is facing him.
He stalks to her and pulls her roughly against him, catching her chin and tilting her face up.
“Listen to me, Mei. I am coming for you. Nothing is going to stop me. We belong together, and you are my omega, and I am your alpha. No deal, no world, no ocean will keep me from finding my way back to you.”
