Words echoed up from recent memory.“The old will feel new.”The words of the fortune-teller, so easily discarded before, now rose up with the force of truth. What was the rest?“The new will feel old.”That could only mean one thing: her marriage to Lewis. The spark was gone. So far, any change for the better was mere talk.
There had been a warning, too, she remembered with a small shiver. What was it again? Something about starting anew. Ah, yes…“Love will grow cold until you embrace new beginnings.”Well, that was a two-way street, was it not? She could not fan the embers into flames if Lewis did not make an equal effort.
One thing was certain. Mr. Boyd had reminded her how easy it was to make a compromise that suited both parties. Lewis had only ever wantedherto make sacrifices, to suppress everything he had once loved about her. How was she supposed to embrace all that had been thrust upon her if she did not have her husband’s support and understanding?
How easily Lewis had slipped into his role as heir to the barony! How quickly he had set aside their shared dreams. He would have to put action to his promises before she trusted him again.
Meanwhile, Jillian was free to do all that had been denied her these past six months. It was like a spring shower after the barren cold of winter. Little buds of contentment were sprouting again. The weeks ahead would see her blossom fully into herself once more. Jilly felt the confidence of such certainty seepinto her core and bloom outward until she fairly glowed with optimism.
Time for breakfast. And then a romp through the meadow. A daisy chain for Christopher. Deeper breaths. Broader smiles that stretched from her heart across the entirety of her face.
The letter to Lewis could wait. Lethimwrite first, set the tone. She would matchhisefforts. Since there were currently none, she liberated herself from the need to produce any of her own.
No, indeed, all efforts would be spent on living more fully. And if Lewis wanted to join her on such a quest, she would welcome him.
If not…
A tightness clenched her heart. Jillian pushed it away violently with her mind. She would focus on that which she could control. As for the rest, it would happen no matter what she did today.
Onward, then. To a hearty meal, a day well spent in a field of flowers, and the company of those who loved her as she was.
And, on Saturday, the chance for real celebration, sans finery and meanness behind tilted fans. Just good friends and good fun.
Ah, yes, thought Jilly,life is looking very good, indeed.
