“I am not my sister.”
“Look, I know she followed a more daring path. But I will not ask that of you. Let me make my formal application to your father. I know I am not a wealthy man, but my connection to the Earl of Carthige must count for something. If we choose to remain at my uncle’s estate, you will even be near your family. I cannot imagine what protest your father might have. I do think it is time, my darling.”
Sophia remained unmoving. “For that which you ask, there will never be a time that is right.”
“How can that be? What could your father have against me?” Tobias halted abruptly as a worrying truth bubbled up. “We will not tell him of our secret meetings, surely? It was not how I wanted things. You know that. We must begin again. Do it right this time. Once he comes to know me, he will have no doubt that we are well-suited.”
“I fear that is exactly where the trouble will start.”
Tobias cocked his head to the side. “You have quite lost me.”
Sophia sighed. “Papa will never give me permission to marry you, Tobias.”
“Well,” Tobias said cautiously, “strictly speaking, we don’t need his permission. We are both of age.”
“But he won’t give his blessing.”
“Never? Not even if we are patient and show him how happy we can make each other?”
“Especiallynot then.”
“That doesn’t sound very reasonable.”
“No.”
Tobias pondered this a minute. “Do we…?” He hesitated. “Do weneedthe blessing of an unreasonable man?”
Sophia turned her eyes upon him. Pain filled them, fathoms deep. “If I marry, he will cut me off completely. No inheritance. No contact. Not with anyone still in this house. Not ever again.”
A shocked silence rippled out across the room.
Eventually, Tobias managed to splutter, “But…but…butwhy?”
Sophia rubbed her fingertips against her temple, then cupped her hand around the back of her neck, massaging the tension in it. She closed her eyes and sighed deeply. “Because he mourns,” she said simply. “He mourns my mother still. He is lost without her. She brought balance to his life. Now he is like a man whose foot is nailed to the floor. He goes around and around in circles and makes no progress. Mother was the only one who could have talked sense into him. And we are all that is left of her. To lose any of us is to lose her all over again.”
Tobias sucked in his breath. “I see. Well, I can certainly sympathize with his sorrow.” His thoughts turned to his uncle. Their conversation was still raw in his mind. His loss had been so complete. At least Mr. Grant had a house full of children as comfort. Children who could marry and give him grandchildren. Why would he not welcome that? “It seems to me,” Tobias said with some confusion, “that marriageaddsto his family rather than takes something from him.”
“He does not see it that way.”
“I’m afraid my compassion for him must be rather limited if these are his terms.”
Sophia shook her head. “There is no logic to it. His agony has necessarily become ours. Misery has corrupted our father’s heart. Already, it is forbidden to mention Adriana at all. It is as if she never existed. He has cut her out like a festering wound. Butit is a wound of his own making.” Her fingers twisted into the black silk fabric of her skirt. “And we are all forced to share in his madness.”
“Then let me free you from it!” Tobias urged. “Perhaps your sister was wise, after all. She has escaped to a better life. You can do the same.”
“I amnotmy sister.”
“What if all five of you stood up to him together? Surely, he will not want to lose you all? Hemustrelent in the face of such a terrible prospect!”
“And if he does not? If all of us are left homeless and penniless and fatherless? What will become of Bess? She will have no prospects. And Henry will be forced to leave Cambridge.”
“So, you would rather remain in this house where the shadow of death infects everything.”
“You think I want this?” Sophia’s eyes flashed with anger. “You think I enjoy having to choose between keeping my family and making one of my own?”
“No, of course not! I…”
“You think it is so simple. I should cast off my entire family for your sake. How is the price you are asking me to pay any lower than what my father exacts from me?” Her mouth twisted bitterly. “Sacrifice. Always sacrifice. My mother. My health. My freedom of choice.”
