No. No, don’t do this.
Before the thoughts could properly take root, a large, steady hand tightened gently at my waist.
Master Lee.
His thumb stroked once. And somehow that one gesture was enough to ground me in the present. The simple pressure of his palm anchored me in a way that startled me.
“Breathe,” he murmured quietly above me.
I felt myself following his command and rejoiced in even more stress rolling off my shoulders.
Air filled my lungs slowly. I hadn’t realized how shallow my breathing had been until that moment.
Inhale.
Exhale.
Master Lee’s hand didn’t move away. He didn’t rush me. He didn’t demand anything.
With Perry pressed up close against my front, it only made the question bouncing around in my head all the louder and more impossible to ignore.
What did this all mean?
I had let myself want them. Not just physically, either. That part I could almost dismiss as heat, hormones, and proximity.
But I’d wanted the way they handled me. The way Perry had looked at me like I was something precious and devastating all at once, and the way Master Lee had grounded us both without hesitation. Not to mention how Master Tyrell was a warm, soothing presence that left me feeling precious and protected. I swallowed.
It wasn’t a mistake.Thatwas the terrifying part. I didn’t regret it.
“I didn’t…” My voice came out smaller than I intended, and I had to clear my throat. “I didn’t think I could feel this good after feeling so low.”
Perry’s thumb brushed gently across my lips but I couldn’t make myself meet his gaze.
The room stayed quiet for a moment after my words settled between us.
Master Lee’s hand continued its slow, absent strokes at my waist. “What happened yesterday, sweetheart?” he asked finally.
Perry shifted slightly, his forehead pressing against my shoulder like he needed to stay connected while we talked. His arm tightened, warming me in a way a blanket—no matter how soft and fluffy—never could.
“You don’t have to give us every detail,” Perry added softly. “Just… help us understand what happened, so we know how to help in the future.”
I swallowed. “I got a text,” I started automatically. “From Master Troy.” Even saying his name felt strange now. Like some kind of betrayal. To him or to them, I wondered.
“And?” Master Lee prompted gently.
“And I realized I’d forgotten about him.” The words tasted sour. “Completely. I’d spent the time with you, and I hadn’t even thought about him and Master Archie. Not once.” I worried my bottom lip with my teeth before continuing, “At first I tried to convince myself it was okay, because we’d all been honest and open about what was happening... and wasn’t that the point? For me to get to know everyone and give each date my all? But then I couldn’t figure out what to say to him, and with all the stress from the gl?—”
I broke off, realizing I was about to tell them about the glitter bomb we’d let off in the rope play workshop and my eyes pinged to Perry. His face was just as comical as mine must be, and neither of us knew what exactly to say.
Thankfully, Master Tyrell broke into our guilt-ridden silence. “That’s quite a lot for one Little girl to handle, button. Relationships are hard work, and you’ve been dealing with quite a bit, having to navigate so many of them. No wonder you had a bit of a mental fritz.”
Guilt gnawed at me. I was already hiding the prank of all pranks from them. I couldn’tnottell them the rest too. They deserved to know.
“It wasn’t about Troy and Archie,” I whispered slowly. My stomach dipped again. “It was about me.” I took a slow breath. “I’ve spent my whole adult life being… composed. In control. Independent. Strong.” I laughed softly, but it came out shaky. “I’ve dated the kinds of men who liked that I knew what I was and what I wanted.”
My throat tightened. “And then I got here.” My fingers brushed unconsciously toward where the pacifier had fallen. “And last night I finally realized I don’t want that anymore.”
The admission sat between us.
