CHAPTER 43
Arie
THE WHITE SILK WEDDINGdress flowed over my curves, hugging them until it hit my knees, where it flowed out in an abundance of fabric. The enormous tiara on my head belonged to my mother. I’d never worn it before today.
“You look just like her,” Farideh breathed.
Havah wiped a tear from her eye. “You’ll make a beautiful queen.” As if this was what mattered most.
Like everyone else, they were convinced this was the wedding day of my dreams. Nothing I said could sway them. I knew, because I’d tried. If one more person told me it was just pre-wedding nerves, I didn’t know what I’d do, so I clenched my teeth and stayed silent.
Without meaning to, I saw myself through Havah’s eyes. Honey-toned skin, dark brown eyes flecked with amber, face framed with waves of black hair that touched my lower back, dripping with diamonds around my neck, hanging from my ears, and of course, a thick coating of them on my crown.
A vision,Havah thought as she sniffed, turning away to compose herself.
I supposed I was.
But I found no joy in it.
My wedding would take place at sunset in the midst of the Summer’s Eve feasting and dancing. It seemed as if Amir had never bothered to cancel it. The whole castle buzzed with delight and anticipation.
Even though the young woman staring back at me in the mirror wasn’t smiling, when I glimpsed myself through Havah’s eyes once more, I was a vision of pure joy. How was that possible? This new trait of my Gift only made me feel more alone than ever.
Shaking the image from my mind, I avoided my reflection, remembering instead the vision of my father lying broken in his cell, which was burned into my memory. I needed to act quickly. It was tempting to use the tunnels and try to escape, but this time I needed to take a stand, otherwise Amir would never stop.
“Havah,” I said, “would you be a dear and go fetch my mother’s... perfume?” I grasped at straws, searching for something that hadn’t already been provided to me. “I want something to remind me of her.”
“Oh, how lovely!” Havah sighed yet again. “Of course, I’ll be right back.”
Alone, I hurried to dig through my drawers, searching for a weapon. Anything sharp really, but a dagger would be nice. I tried to remember where I kept that small blade from a childhood birthday. Had I left it in the stables after my last ride?
As I searched for it or a sharp object of any kind, I came up empty. “Come on, come on,” I muttered as I raced to the closet, digging through the shelves in the back, making a mess. But if there’d been a weapon of any kind, it’d been stripped from the room.
I sank down on the bed. I’d never felt so alone.
At that moment, the door clicked open and Havah returned. “What’s wrong?” she asked when she saw my posture.
“Oh, now you can tell something’s wrong?” I snapped. It was unfair of me. She was under his influence, or she would’ve listened.
The bed dipped as she settled onto it beside me and wrapped her arms around my shoulder. “You can tell me,” she said gently as she rubbed my arm.
I wanted to scream. Instead, I pulled out of her embrace and turned to look at her, taking her hands and squeezing. “Will you do something for me, Havah? Please? Without any explanation?”
Her forehead wrinkled at the pressure on her hands and my strange request, but I pressed harder. “Please. You’ve known me my whole life. Do you trust me?”
“Of course.” Havah smiled as she tucked a loose strand of my hair behind my ear. “Tell me what’s got you so upset?”
“I will, I promise.” And if I lived through this, I vowed that I would. “But right now, I need you to do something for me, and I need you to keep it a secret. Can you do that?”
Slowly, Havah nodded, though her frown deepened.
“In the stables, I have a dagger,” I began. When Havah reacted, trying to tug her hands out of mine, I squeezed tighter, leaning toward her so she couldn’t help but meet my eye. “It was a gift, from my father,” I added, stretching for an explanation that wouldn’t raise any alarms. “I’m worried about him, Havah.”
I hoped against hope that the mention of him might trigger some real memory of what was going on, but she raised her brows and asked, “Whatever for? He’s just taking a short nap before the festivities begin.” So, that’s what he was telling them.
