His eyes bug. “HollyMayberryis looking into it.” He sounds incredulous.
“She likes Jane, okay?” I say defensively. “And she hates the Labelles. She agrees that it sounds suspicious, and besides, she gets off on doing shit like this.”
A mischievous look fills his eyes. “When did you become so intimately aware of shit Holy Mayberry gets off on?”
I throw the dishrag at him, but he catches it in midair and laughs.
“Why don’t you tell me how youreallymade that mess?” he asks.
“Fine,” I say with an exaggerated sigh. “Holly brought the computer over, and I ripped her clothes off, threw her on the kitchen counter, covered her with flour, and fucked the sense out of her.”
He stares at me for a long moment, then releases a chuckle. “While I’d like to believe that’s true, there’s no way that actually happened. Although you really should consider breaking your stupid rule. You two would be perfect together.”
I try to ignore the little skip of my heart. “What the hell makes you say that?”
His brow’s raise. “The way you two bicker? It’s like something’s been brewing between you for years. If you ever actually hooked up…” He raises his hands to mimic a large explosion, adding a sound effect, then throws the dishrag back at me.
I catch it and rinse if off in the sink, considering telling him that I really did fuck Holly, just not in the way I described, and that it was pretty fucking fantastic. But a couple of things stop me. For one, it feels wrong to tell him—not because I’m ashamed I slept with her, but because it would feel disrespectful to Holly to say something, especially because she and I haven’t decided what to do about all of this. Would she even be open to starting something with me? Do I really have time to consider a relationship with everything else going on?
“Hey, whatever happened with that online dating thing you’re doing for Rory? Weren’t you talking to someone?”
“I was.”
“Past tense,” he says, walking over to the fridge and pulling out two bottles of beer. “What happened?” He pops the top off one and hands it to me, then pops the top off another for himself.
“We were supposed to meet, but the AI on the app messed up the location. I thought it said Big Jump Mountain, but when I got to the restaurant, I saw Calliope Labelle.”
He gasps. “She was catfishing you?”
Frowning, I say, “I don’t think so. Rory assures me there’s no way to game the system, but there’s no way Calliope wrote the messages I was sent and meant them. I think I either went to the wrong place or didn’t see the right woman.”
“What did she say when you asked her about it?”
“I didn’t. I blocked her before I even got out of the parking lot.”
“You’re a moron.”
No argument there. I feel like shit for blocking Cherrybomb. She was quirky and fun. She deserved better than that, but it feels wrong to unblock her at this point. After what just happened with Holly, I’m not interested in anyone else, and even though I’d like to apologize, it would be like picking a scab. I’d probably only be making myself feel better, not her. “I’m starving. How about we order that pizza?”
“You really need to put pizza on your menu,” Logan says, plopping down on the sofa. “It would save you a shit ton of money on pizza delivery.”
I give the counter one last swipe, then leave the dishrag in the sink. “Do you have any idea how much a pizza oven costs? We’ll stick with delivery.” I pull out my phone and put the pizza place on speed dial. “The usual?”
“As always,” Logan answers, booting up my gaming system while I call in our order.
We settle in and start the game, but out of nowhere, my brother says, “You’re a great dad, Cole. Better than I’d ever be.”
“I don’t know about that,” I say, keeping my eyes on the game. “I think you’d step up if you ever chose to have kids.”
“Have you ever wondered what Mom and Dad would think of us?” he asks quietly. “I mean, we couldn’t have asked for better parents, and they seemed to really love each other.” He turns to face me. “So what the fuck happened to us? Why can’t we make a commitment?”
“Speak for yourself and Donovan,” I say with a laugh. “I married Millie when I was twenty and had Jane when I was twenty-seven. If that’s not commitment, what is?”
“But you can’t commit now. You won’t even consider a girlfriend. Why?”
Funny how I’ve been giving that serious thought lately, but for some reason I can’t bring myself to tell Logan. “I don’t know. Maybe I like my life the way it is. Why rock the boat, you know?”
But even as I say the words, I doubt them. There’s a hole in my life, and I’m ready for something—or more accurately someone—to help fill it.
Why do I see Holly when I think of who that might be?
