A simple second son.
Kai takes initiative. “Yes, plans were changed. Apologies for the inconvenience, Lord Hamish.”
“Hamish is just fine,” he shoots back with a nasally laugh, sounding embarrassed by the formality. It makes me wonder; for a man with his profile, I’d expect him to revel in the use of his title. Hm. I prod at what’s beneath his performance
He’s been crying. Definitely crying.
“I’m afraid I should be the one offering apologies,” he continues, cheeks flushing further at seeing the empty end table and lack of other living beings. “We’re not strangers toprotocol, I promise you. Regardless of the unexpected arrival, it’s inappropriate to leave you both standing around with no refreshments or a welcome.”
“We weren’t kept waiting, Lord Hamish,” I say, and the formality makes his smile glitch. “We’ve been given time to observe. I thank you for that.” Hamish doesn’t speak right away, though I see his Adam’s apple bob.
I’ve been lied to by better men than him (my father not included). They’ll make it sound like a footman’s fault, like our early arrival really did send the entire estate into disarray. But it wasn’t that. This was intentional, and Kai knows it too. There’s my answer, repeated again, though wordlessly this time.
It’s Kai’s turn to nod. He tilts his head in that infuriatingly affable way and throws Hamish a bone by breathing an affectionately scolding ‘Eric’ at me. “No need to apologise, Hamish. We weren’t waiting long, and I’m sure the castle needed a moment to adjust to the presence of two Atherbournes. I’m surprised we didn’t burst into flames upon entering.”
A joke. I nearly gag.
He’s too charming and full of utter shit. Hamish laughs at Kai’s words, then shakes his head, and I see that relief settle around his shoulders. He’s confirming a suspicion: Kai is the polite one.Safe. And he likes that.
Hamish looks towards me like he’s expecting the same, as if Kai’s diplomacy has bought him comfort. He thinks the storm has passed, but I’m still watching him. Still cataloguing. My expression doesn’t shift, and when I don’t say anything, he looks away first.
“I’ll fetch Lady Sheffolk the Younger for you. She ought to be the one to welcome you properly, given her standing. While you wait, I’ll ensure something is sent to your quarters. A gesture to mend what shouldn’t have occurred.”
The words are kind, but the pivot is abrupt. He’s removing himself from the conversation under the guise of defence. He’ll be passing the tension to someone younger, someone softer and easier to blame if his attempt at pride goes tits up.
It’s a coward’s move.
He walks out in the exact same way he entered: without apology and without invitation. The door creaks again, and as he crosses the threshold, the light from the window catches him all wrong. Behind him, his shadow rolls out, long and strangely shaped. For a breath, just a single fucking breath, it splits.Doubles.
There’s a second one, moving with him but notashim.
I don’t blink, but I do feel my skin prickle. The shape is slightly taller, like a memory given form. My heart is beating faster. I watch it curl, like that ghost is trying to keep him from leaving the room, imploring him to set a better example for their family. There’s a hesitation in Hamish’s stride.
Just one step.
But he doesn’t stop, and the shape of the other man vanishes into nothing.
The door clicks shut as sound crawls out, making the air so thick I can feel my lungs reacting. Kai’s hands are clenched at his side as he stares at the floor. His stillness reaches for mine, an invisible hand trying to grasp onto my coat like a terrified boy. Neither of us speaks.
Because there are some things you don’t say aloud.
Not in a place like this.
8
THE COLOUR OF HER EYES
FRANCESCA
Ithought my nerves would settle after telling Hamish, but they haven’t. Not in the slightest. My knees ache to turn like headlights back to the lake, desperate to keep me aware, to keep that glow flickering lest something move in the darkness. My throat decides (now, of all times) to recall the way it bruised beneath Gabriel’s hands. This tightness in my chest is what I lived with for years before he came for me, since Gran laid our history bare for me to see. That’s why the locket hit so hard, I realise, despite Uncle telling me there’s no reason to be frightened.
This body remembers each day leading up to the test better than my mind even does. I stop by the dresser and force myself to breathe through the fragile shudders rushing through me.
When all else fails, I reach for Percy’s favourite emotional duct tape: words of affirmation.Gabriel tried to kill me, so I killed him instead. The test ends when the heiress survives the traitor. Tradition has been fed. I’ve passed the test.
And yet still, my heart is beating the tune of‘utter bloody lies’.
It beats to the cadence of Gabriel’s breathing as he climbed into my bed. His fingers went for the neckline of my shift first as he sobbed and whispered how much he loved me. How badly he wanted me as his wife. The cries were pained and emotional. And when I struck the side of his face, screaming for help, he turned frantic.
