I haven’t stopped thinking about you either,I thought.
But I didn’t say it.
Because it didn’t matter. What he’d done was a huge betrayal. I wasn’t as angry as I’d been the day it had happened, but I was still angry.
“Goodnight, Dr. Jay,” I said, sliding into my car.
I started the engine and pulled out, glancing in the rearview mirror to see him standing there in the cold, watching until my car disappeared into the snowy night.
CHAPTER 57
The next few days, I spent most of my time inside my motel room either watching TV or driving to a diner for food. I didn’t read. I didn’t write. I was just waiting around for a call.
It sucked, honestly. I couldn’t help worrying that the dental board would dismiss our complaints. The fear that Dr. Pike could just get off for what he’d done was more disconcerting than any other thought.
That morning, I was far too antsy to stay inside, and eventually I decided to go for a walk.
It had stopped snowing, and when I stepped outside the motel, it felt like another world. Everything was bathed in snow from the night’s heavy snowfall, creating a muted alabaster paradise.
The motel was surrounded by forest, and after only a short walk, I was surrounded by trees.
Pine branches dusted with snow completely enveloped me. My boots crunched softly as I walked, and it wasn’t even that cold without my jacket. The sun was out, and ifI’d been athletic in any way, shape, or form, I would’ve been out skiing.
I walked for a while, making sure that when I turned around, I could still see the motel. It would be just like me to get lost in the woods.
So I went slowly, taking in my surroundings and letting the smell of pine and snow calm my tangled nerves.
When I reached a small lookout point, I paused to take it in. The lake stretched out below me, and it was absolutely gorgeous in the morning light. The surface was glassy and smooth. I knew it was probably freezing, but part of me wanted to dive right in; it was that beautiful.
My phone started to ring, shattering the stillness. My heart skipped a beat. The sound was remarkably loud in the quiet stillness of the forest. I hurried to answer it.
“Hello?”
There was no greeting in return. Just static, and I could’ve sworn I heard someone breathing on the other end.
“Hello?” I said again.
Still no answer.
Then the line went dead.
“Hm. That’s weird,” I muttered, glancing at the number. It was a random California phone number. Probably just a spam call, I thought.
I tried to enjoy the view for a few more minutes, but the call had jump-started my heart all over again. I was right back where I’d been before the walk. Jittery and anxious. I sighed and headed down toward the motel, already thinking about food again. Maybe something fried would bring me some solace.
There was a little diner down the street called Oakside,and I’d been going there for almost every meal the past few days.
When I arrived, I ordered a burger and fries, knowing I was using up the very last of my funds and not really caring.
I knew I’d need to figure something out soon. Emily had been a huge support over the last few months, but I couldn’t rely on her forever. I needed to get my life back on track. My savings were nearly gone now, and I’d have to start looking for a job. Any job, anywhere in California. Maybe not even California.
I still had no idea what I wanted to do or where I wanted to work. The writing dream felt impossible now. I hadn’t had a single real desire to write since leaving Big Bear. And so I was just biding my time, waiting until I had to face reality.
I didn’t know where I wanted to settle. Nowhere felt like home. Except Big Bear, and I couldn’t stay here.
So I was in a bind, and I didn’t want to face it. I’d deal with Pike first. Then I’d be forced to start figuring out what to do next. Until then, I was going to eat a burger and fries in blissful ignorance.
My phone buzzed. I checked the notification. It was the group chat with me, Brittany, and Jay.
