“If I don’t,” I said quietly, “how many more people get hurt?”
Emily reached across the table, resting her fingertips over my clenched hands.
“Even if I’m wary, if you think this is the right thing, I’ll support you,” she said. “Whatever path you choose.”
I swallowed. “If I do this, I’ll have to see Jay again. Brittany wants to meet in person to talk everything through.”
Her brow furrowed. “Do you have to see him? Couldn’t you just meet Brittany?”
There wasn’t really another option.
Brittany wanted Jay there. She trusted him. More than that, she believed his presence mattered. She thought we’d have a better chance if a dentist could vouch for us somehow. And as much as I hated admitting it, she wasn’t wrong.
A dentist carried more authority than a dental hygienist. If this ever went to a disciplinary hearing, Jay could testify to what he knew or even just say he believed us that he’d seen enough to trust our accounts. It wasn’t much, but we needed every advantage we could get.
“I think Brittany’s right,” I said quietly. “Jay seems to understand this process better than we do. And he has friends on the dental board, apparently.” Brittany had dropped that little tidbit of information during the conversation, and it was hard not to see the value in that.
“I tried suggesting we do everything digitally, but she said she wasn’t comfortable talking about some of these things over a video call. She wants to meet in person, and if we’re ever called in for an interview, she wants us to go together.”
Emily pursed her lips, then sighed. “Are you ready to face him again?”
“I don’t think I have a choice.” I ran a hand through my hair. The thought of seeing Jay again stirred emotions I’d spent months trying to bury. “I don’t have any real resources without him.”
Emily drained the last of her coffee and stood, her chair scraping softly against the wood floor.
“I guess this means you’re heading back to Big Bear,” she said. “Are you ready for another road trip?”
I nodded even though I was anything but ready.
Talking to Brittany changed everything, and I couldn’t hide anymore.
CHAPTER 55
Emily and I split ways once we reached San Bernardino County. She went in her van toward Mexico while I went in Mason’s Honda toward Big Bear.
She told me to call her with updates.
When I reached the main road into Big Bear, it felt like coming home after a long trip. I don’t know how, after only a few months of living here, this place could feel more like home than my actual home, but it did.
I drove through the sea of pine trees and rolled my window down a little bit to breathe in the cold, mountain air and tried not to think about how in only a few hours I’d be seeing Jay again.
I hadn’t spoken to him since that day when my dad showed up at his house.
I’d sent any calls from Jay, my parents, or Mason to voicemail. Macey and Tyler had tried to check in too, but I hadn’t had the willpower to respond to them either.
I still had my brother’s beat-up car, and you knowwhat? At this point, if he wanted it back, he would have to come and get it.
I didn’t want to give anyone even an inch to try and decide something for me, to convince me of anything. I just needed space. Real space.
They probably thought I was crazy. But I was trying to protect any peace I had left.
The motel I had googled sat just beyond the edge of town; it had a red neon sign that readVACANCY. It flickered—the Y completely burned out. The building itself was really ragged and tired-looking, with paint peeling and water damage on one side, showing in dark brown rivulets. It wasn’t charming or cozy. But it was far away from everyone and cost me only thirty bucks a night.
I parked and cut the engine.
When I walked inside, I was greeted by the smell of cigarette smoke and old carpet. A space heater sat near the front desk, and a small TV on a stand was against one wall with an old sitcom playing. The woman checking me in didn’t talk too much. She said hello, then after I paid, she slid a key card across the counter, told me the Wi-Fi password was taped to the lamp, and wished me a good stay without looking up.
My room was at the very end of the motel.
