I must’ve fallen asleep on the sofa, and he’d carried me into the bedroom.
“It was just a dream,” he said, his hand on my arm, slowly rubbing circles near my elbow. “It’s okay. I’m here.”
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you,” I said, reaching up to put my head in my shaking hands. I rubbed my eyes, trying to shove the images from my head.
“It’s okay,” he said.
“I—” My voice cracked, and I swallowed. “I thought I was back there.”
“You weren’t,” he said gently. “You’re not.”
I nodded, even though my pulse was still racing and I was struggling to push the numbness away that had crept up my face. Jay shifted, moving to sit fully on the bed now.
“Do you want to talk about it?”
“Not really.”
I looked up, about to tell him I was fine and he could go. I’d had similar dreams before, just not in a long time.
A selfish part of me wanted him to stay. Because in the darkness like this, without the light to illuminate all the reasons I shouldn’t, I felt bolder. Like I could pretend I was still in a dream. Maybe if I let him stay in the dark, I would wake up, and it would all fade away in the morning light.
“Can you stay?” I whispered.
There was a long pause, and as each second passed, fear of rejection started to make its way up my spine.
I shouldn’t have asked that.
“Scoot over,” Jay suddenly said, his voice huskier now.
Relief washed through me, and I obeyed, moving over to the other side of the bed so he could climb in.
There was the sound of sheets rustling, and then suddenly everything went still.
I could feel the heat of him radiating even from a foot away. And I could smell the hotel shampoo that he’dshowered with. He overtook my senses, and gradually the effects of the nightmare started to fade.
I lay on my side, bringing up my hand to rest beneath my cheek.
He turned toward me, mirroring my position. His navy eyes met mine.
“I’m not going to touch you, Hope.”
“I know.”
“Go to sleep. I’m right here.”
“Goodnight, Jay.”
“Goodnight.”
CHAPTER 43
The next morning, in the conference room for the second part of our CE, I scanned the room nervously, worried I might see Dr. Pike among the attendees. But there was no sign of him.
“Hey, you okay?” Jay asked quietly as we settled into our seats at the same table in the back that we’d occupied the day before.
I nodded. “Yeah, I’m good. Just a bit on edge after yesterday. But I don’t see him anywhere.”
I had woken that morning to find Jay was already gone from the other side of the bed. In fact, he had already showered and gotten ready before I’d even woken up.
