She woke up feeling like the underside of a used cardboard box. Her mouth felt like it was lined in cardboard, too.
It was just great.
She had slept well for being sprawled out on her sister-in-law’s couch, really, and she wasn’t all that sore. But she crept out as early as possible, heading back to Painted Ridge so that she could take a shower in her own apartment and get dressed. It was kind of funny that the first night she had all of her things, she hadn’t spent at home.
The conversation with Aiden was ringing in her head, and she was trying not to go over it. There was nothing valuable to get out of it. That was the problem.
That was the problem with letting go and ranting like she had.
It hadn’t accomplished anything. He didn’t feel bad. He felt justified. Nothing made that clearer than the way that he had actedsurprisedthat she was upset he took the money. The way that he had told her with confidence that they got jobs because of him.
When she got out of the shower, she had a text from Cara.
Are you well?
I’m doing as well as can be expected. Showered and ready to meet up at Juniper and Sage in an hour.
She made coffee and decided to take it down to the lobby. Again, enjoying the empty space. Soon, she would meet her chef, Laney, and the restaurant staff would be in, even before they opened, getting everything prepared. Soon, there would be housekeeping, and she would be training employees for the front desk.
But there was this week of calm, and she desperately needed it. Since her nerves were anything but.
She finished her coffee, took her cup back upstairs, and let herself stand there in the solitude.
The truth was, she had never really lived by herself. She had either had a roommate in college or been with Aiden. Maybe she could enjoy that. This… New adolescence. She had felt that last night, walking by that bar. She had felt empowered, even. Because she could do whatever she wanted.
Again, she saw Cody.
Cody.
There was time. Time until everything opened, time until everything started running. Really, she was hardly his employee right now.
He was barely her boss at the moment. Except for the whole signing her paychecks and being in charge of whether she kept her job or not.
The rationalizing continued as she made arrangements with Cara, who was going to pick her up from the hotel, because she would be going to the cabins with Cody after they went to the bakery.
And she wouldn’t mind riding with him.
Was she engineering something? She liked to think not.
Maybe her motives were entirely innocent. Maybe her intentions were pure.
But the little kick of excitement between her legs, the intense feeling that made her limbs a little bit loose, told her that she was not pure of heart at all.
She probably wouldn’t do anything, though. Historically, she wasn’t very brave.
Historically, she found security and clung to it. Historically, she didn’t make big moves.
If she could give Aiden credit for one thing, it was that.
When she put down roots in a place, she wanted to stay in it forever. When she put down roots in a place, she wanted to keep them.
Aiden was the one who usually wanted to move on to bigger and more different things.
Standing here, on the other side of their relationship, with that conversation ringing in her head, it was hard to imagine they were ever together, much less for fifteen years. He was exemplifying everything she hated right now, and it was turning her into something she’d never wanted to be.
But when she’d met him, she’d been cautious and wounded, and he’d been fun and light. He’d had a wonderful family who had embraced her from the first time she’d come over to their house, like caring for her was easy. That had never been her experience at any other point in her life up until that point.
His infatuation with her had felt like the sun coming out from behind the clouds. It had made her feel safe, even while his enthusiasm and adventure-seeking had given her something wild. He was the personality. She was the organization.
