Could this be Lightbringer? I was so wild with terror it was hard to close my eyes and turn inward, tofeel.
Slowly, I became sure I was not alone in my mind. There was another presence moving through, and I had the strangest impression of a gentle violation—of an invited guest rifling through the contents of my mind to uncover my secrets.
“Who are you?” I whispered.
My voice came out steady. Small mercies.
I did not want to assume. I did not want to name Lightbringer and be wrong. I did not want to offend whatever was in the room with me right now.
My dragon, if this was a dragon, said nothing.
Could this be one of Fear’s tricks?
I opened my eyes feeling none of the certainty and joy that had marked the Claiming.
Instead, I stepped carefully toward the edge of the scorched circle, bracing myself to be incinerated. The raw burning ache of my thighs returned with every step. My hands curled into fists, trying to harden myself to what would come when I stepped out of the circle. I hesitated at the edge, wondering if there was something else I should do. I looked at Fear, then Ander. Ander was blank-faced. Fear grim. Neither helped.
I put the toe of my boot on the other side of the circle and then launched myself forward as Kiegan had launched himself toward the altar. I breathed in the scent of smoke, but nothing happened. Cool air moved over my skin.
I made it back to Ander’s side.
Across the hall, Fieran relaxed, no longer fighting off his friends to reach me.
“What’s wrong?” Ander asked. As soon as I opened my mouth, he saw something in my face, and he caught my arm and pulled me away.
He glanced back. As always, he was acutely aware of where Fieran was and what Fieran felt. He had to know it drove Fieran mad that he was the one standing beside me.
Ander led me into an alcove at the back of the chamber overlooking the grassy opening—and the sea beyond. The dark, roiling sea. I was supposed to shift and throw myself off those cliffs to fly.
“My dragon didn’t speak to me, Ander.” I blurted out the words. “I don’t know who it is.”
Reflexively, he frowned. Hardly a comforting response.
“We’ve never had a mortal dragon-marked before, so maybe it makes sense that I’d have a strange dragon.” I was babbling and I knew it.
“Perhaps,” Ander said, looking as unconvinced as I felt.
“Go back,” I told him. “The other members of Clan Amber will need your support, especially after seeing that.”
He hesitated; we both knew it was true. “Are you sure you’re all right alone?”
He reached out to squeeze my shoulders.
“She’s better off that way,” said a familiar voice from behind me.
I wasn’t sure I could handle Fieran right now on top of everything else, but I rested my hands lightly on Ander’s forearms. “At least you know that I’m safe with Fieran.”
“I don’t know about that.” Ander looked at me carefully, checking in with me to see that I meant for him to go, then nodded. “It will be all right, Cara.”
Then he walked back into the chamber to support a clan he had put at risk for my sake, leaving me with a man he didn’t trust, because he always respected my agency. It occurred to me that I had chosen entirely the wrong man.
But I didn’t want anyone else. I wanted Fear, this cocky, charming, manipulative mistake.
Fieran started to speak, but I held up a finger. “Do you know why my dragon won’t talk to me?”
He shook his head.
“Then just be quiet for now and let me try to talk to her.”
