Although, his words struck a chord deep in my stomach that I knew would take hours to undo. The slums where the humans lived were bad. People lived in squalor, fighting over the smallest amounts of food.
“I know it.” I told him, my jaw clenched. I had been to the tavern manytimes as a child. It was grim, somewhere people went to hide in the shadows to make dodgy deals. It was the same place my family had made the deal to sell me as a slave.
“You will stay close,” he commanded, ignoring my uncomfortable posture. His eyes looked at me but not really, as if he was looking through me rather than seeing anything about me.
“As always.” I said with a sigh, fighting the urge to roll my eyes. I knew the drill by now. Stay close, don’t move without his permission, don’t think, don’t breathe.
“The Siren Queen is not the same as the others. She is indulgent, whilst the others have their own motives, she will delight in discomfort. She tests boundaries and will want to watch who flinches first,” Rhael warned, his own jaw clenched in discomfort.
“You think she will try to make me flinch?” I asked, knowing that it would be a challenge, especially in the tavern where I already knew I would feel out of place.
“No, I think I will be the one she looks to make weak,” he whispered, causing my eyes to widen and shoot up at his face. Rhael was never one to admit weakness, it was unnerving.
“When do we leave?” the words barely audible as my brain struggled to deal with the information I had been given.
“I will need some time to remain calm after what has just happened, and I would like to wait until I have heard from my sister and know that sheis safe.” Rhael explained.
I watched his eyes moving from me to focus on his desk, not touching anything yet but just observing the stack of paperwork that had been laid out there amongst countless letters and pieces of information.
“So, when?” I asked, mentally calculating in my head the amount of days it would take to bring someone back to Pyrhador from Vaetharyn, and even more time to make sure someone would settle in and be deemed safe.
“Four days. That will be enough time for me to have received word that Olesia has arrived safely in the Dragon Lands” he explained, his hands fiddling with a small piece of paper perched on top of a pile on his desk.
I forced myself to look up from his hands to his face, my eyes narrowing as the words sank in. Four days was less than I thought, however from the way he spoke it was clear he did not expect to wait and hear from Olesia herself.
That was when I realised he meant spies. Despite all his efforts to rebuild his relationships with the other kings it was clear he still did not trust them. It should not have surprised me that I would not be the only lesser creature he used to find information, or use to his advantage.
The realisation sank deep under my skin and settled there. Despite the comfort and routine, we had created, I was once again reminded I was not special and anyone could have taken my place should The King deem it beneficial.
“Do you have spies everywhere?” I asked, laughing softly, trying to fill the silence.
“Only where I need them,” he mused, a small smirk on his face that made me feel almost uneasy, as if it was a warning that there was nothing I could do about it. That no matter where I was he would know what I was doing and with who.
“Noted.” I whispered, raising my eyebrows as I turned back towards the door. It was clear the conversation had reached its end, and I feared the silence would prompt me to ask more questions about how he was feeling.
If it was the one thing I wanted to avoid it was asking the Fae King how he truly felt. Even if I had wondered. Instead, as I left his office, I focused on a problem of my own.
The vampire would be back for my decision in three days, and I honestly still was so unsure of my answer.
Chapter Twenty Two
Sleep seemed to actively avoid me between the Dragon King’s departure and our journey to the human realm. The thoughts of the vampire returning clung to me like a second skin, cold and suffocating.
Every time I closed my eyes I could imagine her standing in front of me, cold fingers curling around my wrist. The soft promise of freedom lingering just outside of my grasp, waiting for me to lean forward and grab it.
The concept of freedom almost felt foreign now. Something I had craved for so long, something I had fought for, had begged for in the darkest nights of my life, that now didn't seem so glamorous. It didn't even pull me the way it used to, instead I fell deeper into accommodating my life within Vaetharyn, with Rhael as my master.
I hated myself for it. The way my thoughts drifted to him without permission. I measured my days by his moods, the sound of his footsteps in the corridor. I craved the warmth of his presence even if he did not say a word. I had belonged to masters before, too many of them to count, but Rhael was different.
I had learned how to survive torture and violence from those masters, yet I had been unable to distance myself from the man who had the potential to be the cruellest of them all. For some reason, I still stepped into his orbit willingly, and I was not sure my mind would ever allow me to find my way out.
The closer the seventh got the more I withdrew into myself. I had stopped going to the library, stopped looking forward to those afternoons of comfortable silence.
I spent a lot of time alone, trying to clear my head and find a way to make the decision I was faced with. If Rhael noticed he said nothing, busying himself for his latest preparations never once asking if there was anything going on with me.
It was painful, but I preferred it. If he had asked me what was going through my mind there was no guarantee that I would not spill everything to him, like blood seeping from an open wound.
The night of the seventh day, I lay awake long after the castle had gone still. Staring at the dark canopy above my head, listening to the distant sigh of Vaetharyn settling into sleep. We would be leaving for the human realm in two days, and I was no closer to finding any sort of resolution.
