“You don’t believe me,” Finlay said, flushing. “You think I’m just a kid.”
“No,” Zane said. “Every kid is a kid. That doesn’t mean they’re all the same, or that they’re not interesting. You’re pretty interesting, mate. So tell me what you meant.”
“That’s Uranus,” Finlay said instead, because he waslooking through the telescope again. “Near Jupiter. It’s blue, because it’s almost all ice, except for the core. The planets are all pretty different. Except Mars, but that’s still pretty different from us. It looks like you could live there, but you can’t, because the atmosphere’s too thin.” He stood back to let Zane look. “Pity the sun’s coming up, so we can’t see more.”
“Mm,” Zane said. “This was good, though. It’s pretty early yet, but we could probably rustle up a coffee and a snack. What d’you reckon?”
“Yes,” Finlay said, “because I’m hungry. I’d rather have a smoothie, though.”
Twenty minutes later, the palm fronds rustled overhead in the morning breeze, the low sun slanted across the water, and Zane sipped his coffee and thought,Go easy.The two of them were alike, maybe, Skylar and Finlay. Wary, that was the word. “So,” he said. “Real things are hard to see.”
“Yeh,” Finlay said. “Like gravity, but not really, because you can feel that, once you know what you’re feeling. Youdostick to the floor, and things fall downwards. Maybe more like light, and how the colors are just a mix of different kinds of light. White light doesn’t really exist, you know. It’s just a mixture of all the colors, but itseemslike it exists. And time zones. How it’s one time here and another in Aussie, because the sun’s hitting the earth at a different angle there. But even though the time’s different, it’s really thesametime. If you rang somebody up, it would still be now there.”
“Complicated,” Zane agreed.
“Yes. Complicated things are more interesting, but they’re harder to understand.”
“And things that seem real but don’t actually exist?” Zane asked. “What about them?”
Finlay looked down. “You can tell me,” Zane said. “I’m interested.” Second time he’d said that in about ten hours.
“I meant more like feelings,” Finlay said. “Like howGranddad used to say I was his best mate, back when I was little.”
“Ah,” Zane said. “And now he’s wrapped up in my Nan.”
“Yeh. Peter was a bit like that too, though, so maybe that’s just how grown men are. I don’t know, because I don’t know that many men. I don’t think I’m like that, though. I don’t think I’d stop loving my mum just because I got older, or Olive or George, either, because I’m their brother. I don’t think you should stop loving your whanau.”
“No,” Zane said. “You shouldn’t. But you think Peter did.”
Finlay shrugged. “He acted like he really liked me at first, Mum said, but once they had Olive, he liked her better, because she was his real kid. He always said, ‘My first child.’ I remember that. Stepdads are different from real dads, I guess.”
“They are if they’re dickheads,” Zane said, and when Finlay looked at him, startled, he added, “Because Peter doesn’t seem to have been good for much, sorry, and that’snothow all grown men are. I don’t think he was very good to your mum, either.”
“Yeh,” Finlay said. “He didn’t work that much, I don’t think, because Mum would ask him what he’d done that day, and he’d say, ‘Why are you always hounding me? I don’t have a time clock, OK? I don’t have a classroom I have to stand in for six hours a day to earn my pennies.’ And then Mum would look tired and make dinner or something. He was meant to collect me from school, too, but sometimes he wouldn’t come, because he was doing something on his computer, and I’d walk home instead. That was OK. I could walk home. It isn’t very far. I’m just using it as an example. He wasn’t very reliable, and Mum thinks being reliable is one of the most important things.”
“What were you then,” Zane asked, “Year One?”
“And Year Two. But I remember. I’m not making it up.”
“Mate,” Zane said. “I don’t think you’re making it up. Ithink you were brave. You didn’t tell your mum, I guess, even though she’d have been right there at school and you could’ve just gone to her classroom.”
“No. I didn’t want them to argue. And I told you, I could walk home.”
“I’m pretty sure your Granddad still thinks you’re his good mate, though,” Zane said.“He’snot worthless, just got his head turned all the way around at the moment. Men can be like that when they’re in love, especially at the beginning.” Finlay made a face, and Zane smiled. “Have you asked him to spend some time with you? What did you do together before?”
Finlay shrugged and looked out to sea. “We went fishing sometimes, I guess. Olive doesn’t care about fishing and George is little, so it was just us.”
“You could ask him, of course. Tell him you miss it. People don’t always know how other people feel.”
“Granddad’s old, though. He’s almost eighty. You should know by the time you’re old.”
“Nah, bro. Not that easy. Not until we can look into other people’s minds.”
“Like with an MRI machine,” Finlay said. “Except that only shows your brain, not your feelings.”
“Exactly. If you miss your granddad, tell him. And I know it’s not the same, but I do some fishing myself, when I have the chance of it. Practically have to, don’t I, being Maori and all. I was wondering something, actually, and you may be able to help me with it. Where do you think your Mum would like to go during the summer holidays? She likes this, I think. It’s the beach, and the beach is never bad. But what would she really like?”
“You should ask her,” Finlay said. “Like you told me to.”
