Nodding his thanks to Jeffrey, Kaj strolled toward the back stairs. He passed the small office, the main-floor laundry suite, another closed and locked door. The narrow stairway led both up and down. He opted to go up to the second floor, wanting to check in with Bijou before he ventured down to the war room and attempted to find a way to help the angels in whatever mission they deemed priority.
As he strolled onto the second floor, Kaj had to admit this was the first time he’d relaxed in months. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d walked down a hallway and not anticipated a threat of some kind. Ever since the raids that took down Kardobahn, he’d been looking over his shoulder, expecting someone to appear with the intention of taking him out, too. And every time he looked back, he was reminded that he was on his own, no one to watch his back or fend off an attack. A wash of sorrow covered him as he remembered all he’d lost in those attacks. Not only his father but the Zenith, the males he’d fought alongside for as long as he could remember. They were all gone, eliminated by those fucking beasts.
He exhaled heavily. Sometimes he wasn’t sure what was worse, the shadow beasts whose goal was to eliminate them in their entirety or the fucking traitors who wanted nothing more than to step over Kaj’s body in their efforts to rise to power.
Both were part of the reason he’d sought out Obsidian. Not only because he needed to ensure his daughter’s safety but also because Kaj needed a place to regroup. A safe place. Where he could breathe without worrying about a knife lodging into his lung from behind. Until he figured out what his next steps were, which included gaining solid ground on his reign, he feared he was doomed to his fate, constantly expecting his own demise.
Kaj paused outside the door of the room they’d offered Bijou. He was about to rap his knuckles on the wood and request entry when a sharp pain hit him square in the chest. It was so powerful he actually stumbled, gripping the doorjamb to keep himself upright. The pain was strong enough to have him thinking he might need medical attention or a defibrillator at the very least, but he knew it wasn’t some internal failure of his body. No, this was something far worse than a heart attack.
Forcing himself to stand tall, he strolled farther down the hall, pausing outside the library doors. They were partially open, giving him an unobstructed view of the interior. His gaze swept over one entire wall of literature, past a cold fireplace, beyond the empty furniture that sat stoically in the center of the space, past the windows and drapes.
Then he saw her.
His female.
Only Acadia wasn’t alone.
He watched, that ache in his chest intensifying, as one of the males in the house drank from her vein. Probably a good thing the fucker was taking from her wrist rather than her neck, otherwise, Kaj wasn’t sure he would’ve been able to refrain from slaughtering him.
As it was, that pain radiating through him was a direct result of his female feeding another. With her blood in his veins, Kaj had a direct link to her. And for the past eighteen months, he’d gotten familiar with the discomfort. But it hadn’t been until his return to the angels’ residence that it had grown to epic proportions, the potency threatening to take him out at the knees.
Kaj focused on Acadia, the way her eyes were cast downward, her back ramrod straight. She didn’t seem engaged with the feeding whatsoever, but there was no reluctance on her part, either. She was performing her duties as they were outlined. As he’d learned during his time with her, the Fae were there to feed thefiestreighas well as the warriors slated to protect humans. The mystical fairies were little more than servants in this vast world, even if no one within this residence treated them as such.
While he knew he had no right to intervene, Kaj wasn’t sure how long he would be able to sit back and watch this, literally or figuratively. At least distance had provided some relief. But seeing her, witnessing it with his own two eyes … that was more than he’d bargained for.
It took effort, but he managed to force his feet to move, his legs carrying him back to Bijou’s room. He shoved that image of Acadia to the back of his mind as he lifted his hand and knocked.
Bijou’s soft voice called out a hasty, “Come in.”
He opened the door, and the smile he had forced morphed into the real thing when he saw her sitting primly in one of the upholstered chairs nestled near the fireplace. As had been the case every single day since Bijou had appeared in his life, Kaj felt a sense of peace. For whatever reason, seeing his daughter was a comfort he’d never even realized he’d been missing. How could he have known, though? Until a year ago, he hadn’t even known he had a child. He’d missed out on so much and he didn’t even know who was to blame. Him? Bijou’s mother? Fate? Karma? Someone had caused the rift that made him unaware of his own blood walking upon this Earth, but he didn’t know who.
“Just thought I’d check in,” he said softly, closing the door behind him.
Bijou’s bright green eyes lifted to his face. For a second, she seemed pleased to see him, but that drifted off quickly. “Are you all right?”
Figuring he probably looked as bad as he felt, Kaj fought back the discomfort that churned in his chest. He’d gotten so used to it he hadn’t considered what it looked like from the outside.
“Just tired,” he said because it was partially true. He was exhausted. “And you?”
Bijou glanced around the room before meeting his gaze once more. “Not sure I’ve ever been anywhere as lavish as this. Fresh flowers, sheets … it’s a bit surreal.”
“I know it’s not what you want, but for the time being, this is the safest place for you.”
Bijou nodded, always acquiescent. Sometimes more than was appropriate.
“Will you be remaining here?” she asked.
“For the time being, yes.” At least until she was settled in. Once that happened, he wasn’t sure what he was going to do, but he figured he had a few days to figure that out.
They stared at one another for long moments before Bijou finally spoke.
“I’m not sure what I’m supposed to do about … feeding.”
This wasn’t the first time they’d come up against this issue. The two of them had been battling that biological demon for quite some time.
Though it was rare, a mother or father could and did feed their children once the child reached the age at which he or she required blood. Once a vampire reached puberty, their world changed intimately, including their need for blood to survive, which for some families became an issue. Most families outsourced their blood needs to someone not related since their blood proved to be stronger. As for Kaj and Bijou, it probably wouldn’t have been an issue if they’d known one another better, but in the beginning, neither had thought it appropriate considering the level of intimacy feeding entailed.
And now, as the Alpha, Kaj was unable to feed another unless it was his own mate.
