He’dbe smart to remember that he couldn’t have a normal relationship with a man.Especially not this man. Considering he knew how much they’d have to hide fromthe world, Ethan didn’t want to drag Beau along for that hell ride. It was hardenough having casual relationships much less one that might involve somethingfar deeper.
Shakingoff his train of thought, Ethan jumped down from the counter and decided to getsome fresh air. Didn’t matter that the temperature was probably close tofreezing at this point. His body was hot enough as it was, a little cool nightair would likely do him a world of good.
??
Beauglanced behind him, watching Ethan as he disappeared out of the kitchen. Hecontinued to finish up their breakfast dishes, rinsing and putting them in the dishwasher.Once that chore was completed, he added dishwashing soap, which he found in thecabinet under the sink, and then flipped the machine on.
Withhis goal accomplished, he glanced around the kitchen to make sure he hadn’tmissed anything and then went in search of Ethan. He had heard a door open andclose near the back of the house, so that’s where he started. He found Ethanstanding on the back porch, his arms crossed over his bare chest and his hairblowing in the breeze. Not wanting to interrupt his thoughts, Beau chose towatch him for a minute.
Ittook only a second for Beau to get lost in a fantasy that the two of them weretogether like this, living as a couple, sharing their lives with one another.It seemed too perfect, almost unattainable.
Andhad he given it any thought before today, he would’ve considered it animpossibility. However, he got the sense that Ethan had let down his guard withhim. Whether he meant to or not, Beau knew what was happening between themwasn’t the normal, everyday casual sex.
He’dseen the look in Ethan’s eyes when they’d made love earlier. Even the secondtime, when they were nothing more than two bodies vying to get closer, Beau hadfelt that connection with him, even if he knew at the time that Ethan was tryingto insert that distance he was seemingly fond of. Up until that point, he’dsuspected Ethan had dropped his guard, letting Beau see him without all thatprotective armor.
Now,as he watched him standing out in the chilly evening air, Beau knew somethinghad changed. Ethan was back to being his usual, self-protected self. What hewas supposed to do about that, Beau had no idea. He really wanted to give himspace, to let him get used to the idea of whatever this was between them, buthe knew if he backed off too much, Ethan would go right back to closing himselfoff entirely.
Beauwasn’t willing to risk that.
Asudden pounding on the front door had Beau jerking, the sound startling him outof his thoughts. He looked over at the door and then back at Ethan who must’veheard it too because he was moving in his direction at a fast pace.
Theback door opened and then closed at the same time the front door opened.
Shit.Had Ethan not locked the door?
“Whatthe fuck?” Blake exclaimed, standing in the doorway like he owned the place.
Ethanpassed by Beau without a word, his attention seemingly focused on the littleman standing in the foyer. Beau noticed how tense Ethan was, his body astraight line, his muscles rigid and flexing as he moved.
“Mythoughts exactly,” Ethan barked, his voice echoing through the open space. “Howthefuckdid you get in my house?”
“Yougave me a key, remember?” Blake responded, his argument not nearly as assertiveas Beau would’ve expected.
Beauwasn’t sure which way he should go. There he was, standing in Ethan’s diningroom, wearing nothing but his jeans, so it was a little obvious what they hadbeen doing. Did he go back upstairs and get dressed? Did he try and sneak outthe back door? Was he supposed to pretend that Blake’s arrival didn’t piss himthe fuck off?
Beauhad never been in a situation like this, and he had no idea what he wassupposed to do.
“Giveme the fucking key,” Ethan yelled.
“Tellme why he’s here, first,” Blake argued, his voice going higher with each word.
“That’snone of your fucking business,” Ethan ground out, his words dripping with malice.
Beauknew the smart thing to do would be to sneak out of the house. The lessconfrontation the better. He knew Ethan well enough to know he’d deny any sortof relationship, interaction, or whatever the hell he wanted to call it andquite frankly, Beau wasn’t sure he could listen to Ethan deny there wasanything between them.
Itwas one thing for Ethan to keep up that wall he’d built around himself where Blakewas concerned, but Beau had penetrated that wall, caused a fissure to start atthe base, threatening the stability of all that denial and he hated to lose thelittle bit of progress he’d made. If he stayed, he’d just end up gettingdefensive, or worse, protective of Ethan. And he knew that wasn’t going to go along way to remaining in Ethan’s good graces.
Asquietly as he could, Beau slipped back upstairs, trying to ignore the vehementargument that was going on in the entryway downstairs. He didn’t want to hearEthan and his excuses. He’d heard so many before and although Beau haddeveloped some strong feelings for Ethan, he knew better than to act on them sosoon.
Hell,it had taken him months to get to this point, it wasn’t like things were goingto change overnight.
Speakingof overnight, Beau glanced at the clock and realized it was almost ten. Andsince Ethan had informed him earlier in the day that he needed to be at work byseven, Beau knew he needed to go. Now seemed like the opportune time.
Beautook a detour into the bathroom to take care of business and then made quickwork of pulling on his shirt, socks and boots. Making sure he had his walletand his keys, he glanced around Ethan’s room briefly. Why was he stalling? Andbetter yet, why did he have the strange desire to stay the night? He justwanted to return to that oversized bed and pull Ethan up against him for thenext, oh, say, eight hours or so.
Afterhe kicked Blake’s scrawny ass to the fucking curb.
Shakingoff the thought and refusing to let his disappointment get the better of him,Beau palmed his keys and then headed toward the stairs. The voices were stillloud and angry, so he knew his hasty retreat wasn’t going to go over well. Notwith Blake and probably not with Ethan. He just hoped he could keep frompounding Blake into the floor. He didn’t want to leave with Blake still there,but it wasn’t like he could stand around and defend Ethan’s honor. That was asurefire way to get his own ass booted to the curb.
