“About us?” Holt asked, a gleam in his eyes.
“There never was anus,” Rafe snapped.
Holt moved so fast, Rafe didn’t have time to react before he was pressed up against the door of his truck, Holt’s big, powerful body pinning him there.
“You make a habit of lying to yourself?” Holt’s voice pitched low. “Because that’s not the impression I got when I was balls deep inside you.”
“Fuck you,” Rafe hissed, thrashing in an attempt to get Holt off him.
It didn’t work. Holt was strong.
“An invitation?”
“Get off me.” Rafe shoved him, but Holt held firm, leaning in until their mouths nearly touched.
Rafe hated himself for wanting to cave. He hadn’t felt this alive in … well, it’d been years. The closest he’d come were those precious few times he’d found himself alone with Bailey. She breathed life into him with a simple smile.
But what he could have with Bailey was the opposite of what he’d had with Holt.
With Bailey, he wanted to love and cherish, to hold her, protect her. He wanted to make love to her, to feel every breath, every sigh. With Holt, he wanted hard, dirty, and fast. He’d never felt that before until that night. Until he’d manhandled Holt and then gave himself over to him.
Even if he was willing to be honest about his feelings, his desires for each of them ran in opposite directions, making it impossible to know which way was up.
“Tell me you don’t want me,” Holt growled softly, his hips pressing forward, the hard ridge of his cock sliding along Rafe’s.
Rafe moaned, surprised by how fucking good that touch felt. It’d been so damn long. Although the town thought he bedded every woman who looked his way, Rafe hadn’t been with anyone in nearly three years. No one since the night he’d spent with Holt in a condo on the beach. These days, his hand was the only comfort he had.
“Goddammit, Rafe,” Holt groaned, grabbing Rafe’s jaw and tilting his head. “I’ve missed you. Don’t you get that?”
It was now or never, Rafe knew. If he gave in, he could enjoy himself for a few nights, succumb to the pleasure and quench that thirst that had been building for years. If he did, they could fuck until they got it out of their system, and then Holt could move on. He could leave Coyote Ridge. Leave Bailey. And Rafe’s life could go back to the way it had been before Holt strolled into town.
Rafe swallowed a whimper that damn near escaped when Holt ground his hips against him, rubbing against his cock. He was driving him insane, and they were both fully clothed.
You don’t deserve either of them. You’ve got nothing to offer.
With that little voice screaming in his head, Rafe brought himself back from the brink.
He cleared his throat. “For a man who just told me he wouldn’t hurt Bailey, you sure aren’t thinkin’ with the right brain.”
That seemed to click with Holt because he released him, standing tall. Their eyes remained locked together. It was all Rafe could do not to kiss him. He merely wanted to remember what it had been like. Just a few minutes to spur that memory so he could make it another three years.
“Don’t fuckin’ hurt her,” he told Holt, reaching for the handle and flinging his door open.
He climbed inside and slammed the door, then waited for Holt to walk away. Only when he was alone did Rafe drop his head to the steering wheel and wish his life had been different.
***
When Holt returned to the B andB, he intended to march up to his room, pull out his laptop, and put some of these heightened emotions to good use. He tended to write better when he was worked up, and he couldn’t remember a time when he’d been this confused.
Unfortunately—or perhaps fortunately, depending on how you looked at it—fate had other plans for him because when he walked in, he found Bailey sitting in the living room by herself, a book in her hand. The room was dark except for the glow from the lamps at each end of the couch.
“Whatcha readin’?” he drawled.
She lifted the book and showed him the cover.
Holt grinned. “Good choice. First in the series.”
“I know.” She shifted, putting her back into the corner of the sofa so that she was facing him. “Violet suggested it. Said it was your best series.”
