“I think we make a good pair, roots withstanding,” Florian joked as he sat beside her.
She pressed her lips together, blushing in an obvious attempt not to smile.
“I saw you at the Holly Festival,” he said, unsure why the memory was surfacing so suddenly. The second thought followed almost against his wishes. “You were with someone.”
Any levity about her dissipated at once, eyes widening and then falling. Her body went rigid as she closed her arms around herself.
Clarity was a cruel mistress. “He’s the one you’ve been protecting all this time,” Florian murmured.
She was silent for so long he feared she might never speak to him again for pushing her this way. Her gaze remained distant, cast out over the pond. But then she spoke, her voice a hollow sound. “Victor, yes.”
“Why did you do it?” He was angry with himself for ruining a perfectly good night, for stealing the warmth from her cheeks. But he was so close to understanding her… to seeing what lay hidden behind her silent, somber moments when she thought no one was watching.
“Because he asked me to, and I loved him.” Yvette refused to meet his eye, staring out at the water as if she could see into its very depths.
Florian watched her, allowing a single thought to echo through his mind until he could hold it in no longer. “And now?”
She looked at him as if he’d plunged a dagger into her side. Pain and outrage warred on her face. Regret flooded him at once. It was a selfish question. Worse, he knew the answer to it, even though he’d wanted to hear her say something entirely else.
Yvette recovered, shaking her head as she tried to hide the fact that she was wiping away tears. She stood, refusing to face him again. He watched her go, without goodbye, without looking back. The impulse to run after her came over him, to scream apologies into the night as if he could erase what he’d done. But that would only be to serve himself, to assuage his own guilt. Florian hung his head. She wanted to be away from him, and he could respect at least one boundary tonight.
Yvette
And now?
Those two words followed her back to the camp as she snuck quietly into her bed. They lingered as she lay there, unsure if Knox was actually sleeping or simply ignoring her, unsure if Florian would come to claim his bed just beside her at any moment.
And now?
Of course, she didn’t love him still. She’d always thought that she was above his games, his lies, but she was more tangled in his deceptions than she ever knew. Victor had lied and kept secrets, kept a weapon to use against her all the while whispering promises in her ears. Was any of it real? Yvette didn’t know what he was capable of anymore after what he’d put Keira through, the cruelty of it. And worse, he’d twisted her into it all, made her a part of it. How could she love him anymore? Victor had hurt her… She could still feel the shock that had run through her body, shattering her heart as he’d pushed her back against that bedpost.
But she could feel his soft hand on her cheek too. She could remember all the freezing nights in the streets, willfully forgotten by the world before he took her in. Even though at first he hadn’t had a choice, she knew that Victor had grown to truly love her. He’d been there every day to check on her as his staff nursed her back to health. He’d given her gifts, stood betweenher and his wretched father, whispered in her ear all the things she’d been longing to hear all her life. Victor had remade her until she was his, until she didn’t know what she was without him.
Of course she loved him.
Yvette had no memory of falling asleep, or where her dreams had taken her. But as Knox began to move about the tent, packing his bags, she was awake. She opened her eyes to see only the barest hints of dawn seeping in, leaving a trail of light over Florian’s undisturbed bed.
Guilt settled like a stone in her gut. He hadn’t even come to bed? She shouldn’t have run off like that. Yet she just couldn’t stand to let him see what his simple question had done to her, to see her fall apart.
Knox did not acknowledge her at all as she stood or even when she left.
Apparently she had slept in, as everyone else was already in motion. Rhea and Gareth were breaking down their tents. Lilith was burying the firepit as across their camp, Florian was watering the horses. As always, Yvette was torn between offering her help and staying out of the way, between seeming like a nuisance or willfully unhelpful.
In the end, she made her way to the horses. She could help there, and she needed to talk to Florian, to apologize for everything last night, for the running, but also for the flirting and the dancing… Clearly he was the sort of person who took such flirtations lightly. That much had been clear upon their first meeting. But it was also clear that he didn’t understand that for her it was more. She didn’t mean to make him think… otherwise.
Her fingers were twisting themselves in a knot by the time he caught sight of her. Florian gave Rhea’s horse a pat on the neck before purposefully striding toward her.
Yvette took in a breath. She just had to clear up any confusion about last night and apologize so that they could focus on the day ahead, on everything they had to accomplish. What lay before them was already impossible enough without-
“I am so sorry,” Florian said the moment he reached her.
What?That didn’t make any sense. Sorry for what? Yvette shook her head clear. “No, I shouldn’t have run off, you didn’t- I was-” She took a breath. “It wasn’t your fault.”
“I had no right to ask you- well anything,” Florian pressed.
She searched his features and found one feeling louder than the rest. Regret. Relief flooded through her. He regretted last night too. That’s why he felt he needed to apologize. He knew they’d gone too far, and he wasn’t mad that she’d run off. He was probably glad she had ended things before they had gone any farther.
Her shoulders relaxed, fingers stilled. “Of course. We shouldn’t have-” Yvette stopped herself. There was no good in bringing it up again. “We should focus on today.”
