“Life back then is not like how it is now. Women do not speak first in 1826.”
“Then you will lose him because he assumes you do not want him.”
“He might think me terribly forward.”
“Or he might be delighted,” he insisted. “I could not have my old life and the woman I wanted, not in the time that would be best for us both. I had to choose.” He looked at Elizabeth, hoping she knew how fortunate he was with his decision. “I could not have both, but you can. You can have the man you want and keep Pemberley.”
“But I have to tell him I choose him?”
He agreed, and he hoped Georgiana was now resolved. She could choose her own happiness like he did.
“Sir,” Roland called, his eyes on his pocket watch. “It’s nearly sunset.”
Darcy hugged his sister goodbye. He felt his heart rate slow to hold her close, and his emotions steady, but the grief mingling with gladness still lingered. He hoped Georgiana felt the love and validation she needed. Her arms lingered around him, and he squeezed his little sister one last time.
Elizabeth gave her a hug, sniffling all the while. He couldn’t hear all that was said, but the sisters clung to each other for a long while before Georgiana went into the circle. He had never had to do this before. He had never had to watch someone else vanish, and he felt wretched to know how his family must have felt when he left them forever, how heartbroken Elizabeth must have felt when he left her in 2011.
Both times, he had been going toward something imperative, either saving his sister and his home, or committing his life to the woman he loved. This goodbye as the passive observer hurt in a deeper way.
It grew darker and Roland put away his pocket watch to pull out his phone to turn on the flashlight. The dim light illuminated where he stood near to the circle, just enough to shine a littlemore light on Georgiana’s face. She gave him a gentle smile that he returned, and he took comfort in the full life she was going back to.
But he couldn’t watch her disappear before his eyes. He would never turn his back to her, but he lowered his gaze to the grass at the last and waited for a few seconds.
Elizabeth gripped his hand tighter, and he knew in an instant his sister would be gone. What would happen to their life then?
Elizabeth watchedDarcy as he drove them back to Pemberley. They could have driven out to Stanton Moor with Tom Roland, but Darcy hated being the passenger. While carsickness didn’t cripple him like it used to, the only way he wasn’t ill was if he was the driver. Thirteen years with motorways and cars, and he still broke out in a cold sweat and nausea once the speed got past thirty miles per hour.
But he wasn’t ill now. The set of his shoulders and his tight grip on the steering wheel must hold the weight of his grief. He was driving fast for him. When the sun set and Georgiana was gone, Darcy had clutched her hand so hard it hurt, like he was afraid she would disappear too. Some of the strain eased when he impulsively hugged her, even though Roland was with them, but it was odd that he was still nearly shaking with tension as he sped back to Pemberley.
She let him sit in his thoughts and feelings until they were nearly home. As gently as she could, she said, “Your approval, your blessing, is going to carry Georgiana forward for the rest of her life.”
He was quiet for so long she thought he would ignore her. “I never wanted that influence over her, at least not after I left.”
“You never lost it because you left.”
Darcy lapsed into silence, and she asked, “Why did Mr Willers say nothing, after all of those years together? Why not her? I get that it’s considered inappropriate, that if a woman speaks first, you’re therefore too brazen to be a decent wife, but come on.”
“Each might have been too blind, or too proud?” he guessed. “But I suspect the greater fault is that both were too afraid to have mistaken the other’s regard.”
“You’re not like that, though.” They had never said the words before he returned, but he had known she loved him enough to risk everything. “You decide and then make it happen. Does that sort of action fit in better with modern life than your old one?”
Darcy parked the car, shaking his head. “People don’t always do that here.” He picked up his phone from the console. “I have more information in my hand than anyone in human history had access to, yet people now still struggle to make decisions. Decisions I would say are simple ones. As much as I love being here, this place isn’t perfect.”
“But people are essentially the same, aren’t they?”
“Oh yes,” he said, but his gaze drifted to the house as they got out of the car. “Elizabeth? Do you think anything changed? Will anything be different once we go inside?” To her surprise, his voice shook. “You and I feel the same, but…”
“Everything will be the same. She marries her devoted steward, the one who knows the truth about all of this.” She was still convinced they were always supposed to help Georgiana marry Mr Willers, but Darcy seemed riddled with tension. She wasn’t sure why since Tom Roland had still been at the circle with them, the house was still here, and nothing between her and Darcy had changed. “Should we check the portrait? Walk around? Or reread her letters to you to make sure she?—”
“No. Only one thing matters.” He gripped her hand and stalked toward their private door, ran up the stairs, ignoredSheryl on the sofa, and then he saw Sandra, sitting in her pyjamas next to her. Elizabeth felt all the strain leave him. He seemed to sag in relief and then strode into the room to scoop her up and hug her tightly.
He never cared about Pemberley’s fate. All Darcy had wanted was her and Sandra, and Elizabeth fell a little more in love with him. How fearful had he been of losing them after Georgiana left? Had he been terrified of it these past three months?
“What are you still doing awake?” he asked when he loosened his grip on Sandra. “You have school tomorrow.”
“I wanted to make sure Aunt Georgiana got to the train station.”
Darcy still held on to her, and carried her to her room, even though she was far too big for such a thing.
