…Right?
God, I hope I’m not.
“You should have someone in your life who tells you nice things every day, Jenna,” I say.
And then—before I can take it back, or make it worse, I turn and force myself to walk away from her.
ELEVEN
Colton
Dear Mr. Dickhead,
Please be advised that your lawyer, who is unfortunately me, has reached the absolute limit of tolerating your recent conduct, which includes but is not limited to:
Smirking the way you do.
Speaking in a tone clearly designed to be irritating.
Existing in my immediate space with unwarranted confidence.
Despite repeated nonverbal warnings, pointed silences, and several deeply expressive eyerolls, you have failed to cease and desist. This leaves me no choice but to issue the following demands. Effective immediately, you shall:
Stop leaning in doorframes like a man in a cologne commercial.
Refrain from using sarcasm.
Return any peace you have unlawfully disturbed.
Explain why you are like this.
