When he doesn’t say anything, simply watches me flick through the shots, I say, “After some light editing, I can send them to you if you want. You don’t have to keep them, though.”
Ryan’s gaze darts to mine suddenly, his hazel-shaded eyes filled with warmth, and he says, “Thanks, trouble. They’re great.”
I hum a somewhat bashful laugh under my breath, right before Gretchen calls, “Model is ready, boss!”
I peer over my shoulder, catching a wave from Nina, and I throw her a thumbs-up before focusing on Ryan again. He’s already watching me, and I give him a sweet smile before I say, “Time to get back to business. Help yourself to lunch, though, okay? Let me know if you need anything.”
With a quick nod and a smile that melts my insides, Ryan gently shoos me away, and I smile and head off toward Nina, delving straight back into work for the rest of the day. All the while, Ryan remains, helping out where needed, bringing me a drink or food when he realizes I haven’t taken care of myself like I should.
By the end of the day, I’m exhausted and ready to crawl into my bed, three shoots in one day wearing me out enough that I could easily fall asleep standing up… again.
Ryan, still sitting in a chair nearby with a pair of clear-rimmed glasses perched at the end of his nose, his chin in his hand and his eyes closed as though he’s resting, decided to stay despite my multiple attempts to send him home. We ran two hours over tonight, a hazard of the job, yet he insisted on staying until I was done. I’ve been told a handful of times that I won’t be catching a taxi home after Ryan brought me into work, and he was very adamant about it.
Smiling softly over at the guy, I tuck my camera away and sling the bag and my purse over my shoulder before quietly walking over to Ryan’s slumbering form. Squatting beside him, I tap his knee and softly call, “Ry? Wake up, Sleeping Beauty.”
“Hm?” he mumbles, slowly rousing but not enough to wake properly.
My smile only grows, and I reach a hand out to his forearm and squeeze gently. “Wakey wakey, Specs.”
Slowly but surely, those tired eyes open and those soft browns land on me right before a sleepy smile blooms over his face. “Hey, you. Are you done?”
“Mmhm, ready to go when you are,” I answer, still holding his arm and crouching beside him, close enough that I can see the way his eyes roam over my face before he nods and stretches out of his seat.
A moment later, he stands from his seat and holds his hand out for me. With a flip of my stomach, those butterflies soaring to life once more, I slide my hand in his and allow him to pull me up. That giddy feeling doesn’t leave as he keeps hold of my hand, reaching for his laptop bag and slinging it over his shoulder before he leads me out of the building, only allowing me to go ahead to scan my badge to let us out.
By the time we’re in his fancy car driving to a restaurant to pick up dinner Ryan insisted on getting, my mind has swung right back to Caiden’s words from days before. I can’t stop thinking about them as Ryan turns on the cooling system in his car, my body still flushed and a little sweaty from work. I can’t stop thinking about it as he turns on Spotify, playing songs I’ve been listening to over the past several weeks that he must have heard. And I certainly can’t stop thinking about it when he climbs out of the car and insists I sit pretty where I am as he hurries into the restaurant to collect our dinner.
It makes me wonder why he’s being so sweet, why he’s being protective, and whether or not Caiden’s words hold a morsel of truth.
By the time Ryan climbs back into the car, slipping behind the driver’s side holding several bags of delicious-smelling food, I’ve thought myself into a frenzy that can only be cured by simply asking the questions running through my mind.
When Ryan pulls off, I turn in my seat and gather the courage to ask, “So, is there a reason you guys are hanging around a little more, not letting me walk around alone and stuff? Not that I mind, because I’ve been enjoying the company, but Caid said something that kind of has me wondering a few things.”
Ryan glances at me before looking back at the road, tapping his steering wheel as he answers, “Caid spoke to us all about the emails. It seems Toby has been lingering outside the apartment, based on those emails, and he pointed out that we don’t really know where else he could be loitering to keep an eye on you. We agreed it was best for someone to be with you for the time being, at least until the police finally do something about it.”
Oh. Well… okay then.
“Huh,” is my only response, nodding slowly while I absorb that explanation.
“We want you to be safe, so we’re taking all precautions,” he adds, flashing me a smile that doesn’t sucker me like it has been doing all day, because the little bubble I’d been forming over the past few days pops so suddenly that the sadness doesn’t seep in immediately. Instead, a heavy sense of disappointment falls onto my chest with the hefty weight of an anvil, my shoulders slumping along with my good mood.
Turns out I have four bodyguards now, not four men who simply want to spend time with me like I was starting to think. That… that kind of sucks. I mean, I guess some women would be gushing at the thought of having four guys protecting them. Don’t get me wrong, it can be hot, but when it turns out the guys you’re crushing on are only hanging out with you out of a sense of obligation rather than a want or need, it kind of dampens the vibe. I’ve been thinking things that aren’t actually real, looking into actions that mean something different. I guess I looked a little too deep into Caiden’s confession, seeing it as something it isn’t. No wonder he said those words so easily, because it was a platonic confession that I deluded myself into thinking was a declaration of mutual feelings.
Apparently, I’m an idiot.
And it wouldn’t be the first time I’ve felt that way.
The thoughts and feelings Toby scarred into my psyche suddenly come roaring back, a harsh notion that I’m too much creeping back from the depths and shadows of my mind where they lurk and linger. My chaos is too much, my drama is too much, I’m too much, and I’ve been dumping it all on these guys like I have a right. They’re only my neighbors, and now they’ve become my obligated sentinels who feel like they have to spend the entire day at my work place and drive me around like glorified chauffeurs.
This… this is not the turn I was almost hoping for, and I can’t lie and say I’m not thoroughly bummed. I don’t even know why, because I still don’t know how any of this would work. I’d have to choose either way, so maybe it’s for the best. Maybe I should consider it a blessing in disguise or something.
I keep telling myself that as I turn back in my seat, facing the front while I wallow in my new puddle of misery, the delicious-smelling food now turning my stomach sour. I fall silent, and I feel Ryan look over at me a couple of times before he turns up a song I’ve listened to so much that I overheard Caid singing it a couple of days ago. It doesn’t hold the same joy as it did before, so I tune it out instead.
By the time we arrive back at the apartment, I’ve thought myself into a horrible mood, my self-deprecating mind dampening the good vibes I’d been carrying with me all day.
Climbing out of the car, silent as the dead, I reach for my bags and the food, waiting for Ryan to round the car before clearing my throat and telling him, “I’m not feeling so great, so I’m going to head on up to my apartment. You guys enjoy the food, though.”
Ryan frowns and accepts the food, tilting his head as he scans my face. I would have thought it was sweet before, but now I wonder if he’s just checking because he thinks he has to.
