I stopped at the last second, when I was only a hair’s breadth away from touching him, and slammed myself back, instantlyputting a body length of distance between us. With a start, I realized how quickly I’d moved. It was fast, but not so fast that some fae couldn’t do it. Yet, it’d been close. My uncle’s magic was likely to take hold of me at any second if I didn’t control myself better.
Kole’s nostrils flared, yet his expression gave away nothing. “Would you like me to fetch the healer?”
I stood frozen, unmoving, and with another jolt, I realized I wasn’t acting fae. Fae moved. They didn’t stand like a statue, not as vampires could. Consciously, I shifted my weight and finally processed his question. “What? No, I don’t need a healer.”
Kole studied me, his gaze burning. “Isn’t that what you told Ree you would do? Since you’re still so cold?”
The thought of the palace healer, Surrep, coming in here, so ancient and fragile, had my thoughts shifting to how easy it would be to drink from her. The elderly healer had unique healing gifts, but I highly doubted she had any training in fighting off powerful creatures. And she wouldn’t suspect a thing. It would be so easy to be alone with her. Compel her. Drink from her. Even fuck her.
A gag worked up my throat, and I spun away. “No. It’s fine. Really,” I squeaked. “In fact, I’m quite tired. I’d like to go to bed.”
Kole’s heartbeat thundered through my ears, vibrating through me.
Drink. Fuck. Suck.
I squeezed my eyes tightly closed. It felt as though his whooshing pulse was a commanding song that threatened to pull me under.Blood. I wanted blood so desperately.
I worked my jaw, trying to get the ache out, trying to relieve myself of these unwanted thoughts and desires, but I could no sooner do that than I could make my heart start beating again.
Inwardly, I seethed.Fuck you, Arnel, and fuck you, God Tenevris, for cursing me with these awful urges.
Kole’s warm presence came up behind me, halting my inner cursing. He placed his hands on my upper arms before I could lurch away.
Leaning down, he ran his nose up the side of my throat. I shivered, and inadvertently, my fangs began to lengthen.
I clamped my lips closed and turned as stiff as a board.
He abruptly stopped. “Do you want me to leave?” he asked quietly.
“Yes.”
Silence followed, the length of it echoing around us before he finally said, “Why?”
Because if you don’t, these urges will continue. I’ll probably force myself on you again, and I might even compel you so I can drink from you. I’ll have complete control of you, and you won’t even know it.
I shrugged nonchalantly. “I’m tired.”
“No, you’re not.”
I squeezed my eyes shut even more, and my uncle’s magic began to stir. Kole was stepping into dangerous territory, and I recalled how much he had studied that paragraph that described vampires. Yet he hadn’t said a thing, and he’d never looked at me strangely today. I took some comfort in that and slowly pried myself from his grip.
“Leave, Kole. Please.”
“Prim—”
“LEAVE!” I lurched away, guilt punching me at how horribly I was treating him again. Just as fast, our conversation from that morning reared, in which he said he would always love me, but I didn’t know if that meant he would stay with me.
Tense and frightened of what he would do next, I waited.
But Kole didn’t say a word. He didn’t even argue.
In a flash of mistphasing magic, he disappeared from my room, and I fell to the floor, knowing it was only a matter of time before the warrior left me for good.
I anxiously waitedfor Kole to return the next day.
I’d spent the night awake, too torn up over how awful I’d been to sleep. I’d even contemplated connecting with him mentally but decided not to. I’d banished him from my room. That didn’t warrant me interrupting his sleep after I’d forced him away. The least I could do was not play with his emotions at all hours.
Instead, to pass the time, I read through the materials Nathaniel had given to me and pored through everything in them.
