“No shit?”His smile went a little crooked.“And you’re not friendly, I’m guessing?”
“We are not.It’s the silver fox I mentioned before.”
“Control issues?”
“Yep.”
“Did he bother you?”
“He tried it, but I shut him down.Being busy helped.”
“Kinda wish you’d pointed him out to me.”Taran chewed thoughtfully on a stuffed grape leaf.
“Why; you gonna beat him up for me, lover boy?”I chuckled.“But seriously, I hope he saw you.And me throwing myself at you.”
“See, now Ireallywish I’d known.I woulda played it up.Wait, stop, can we watchSchitt’s Creek?”
I stopped scrolling on it and hit the play button.“Gay.”
“So gay,” he agreed cheerfully.
When we finished eating, he took my plate and put away the leftovers, refusing to let me help.I was so groggy by then, I just curled up under a blanket.When he came back, I leaned on his shoulder, and he put his arm around me and pulled me in close.Shortcake nestled into the blanket by my hip, and every time Taran laughed, I felt it in his chest, and it was really, really nice.
***
I started awake, wondering why the fuck my face was wet.As I wiped it off and registered where I was (on my couch in front of my tv, which was silently playingSchitt’s Creek), and with whom (my cat on one side, Taran on the other, a big old wet spot on his chest).
“Fuck…” I pushed myself off of him.“Am I drooling?”
“Yep.”He blinked slowly, eyelashes heavy behind his glasses.“You’re exhausted.”
“Fuck, Taran, I’m sorry.”I scooted to the edge of the couch, earning an evil look from Shortcake.“Gross.”
He just chuckled.“I like your drool.”
“Not on your shirt.What time is it?”
“Threeish.”
“Fuck.I’msosorry.”
“It’s fine.It’s Saturday.”
“Oh.Yeah, right.”I looked around, expecting to see a mess—but no, he’d already cleaned up after us, hadn’t he?Just a few beer bottles.I stood to scoop them up.
He grabbed my hand.“Go to bed.I’ll clean up.”
I swallowed hard.Looked at him sitting there all pretty and eager on my couch.And I heard myself ask, “You wanna stay?”
He smiled, then nodded.
As I tripped into the bathroom, I heard him humming as he cleaned up the bottles, and my heart just about burst through my chest like a baby alien.I splashed some water on my face, deciding to skip the whole routine because he was right.I was totally exhausted.But I still needed to brush my teeth or I’d regret everything.
“Fuck,” I whispered to my reflection when I finished.“He’s really likable.Really goddamn likable.Fuck.”
Which was good.But it was also bad.Really bad, because getting any deeper would mean I’d have to go back and actuallycopewith all my damage from when he’d broken my fucking heart the first time.Didn’t take a fucking psychologist to know that no matter how sweet he was, no matter how much I liked him, we were doomed if we didn’t deal with that shit.
We crawled into bed in our underwear, and Taran rolled over to face me once he was under the covers.I reached out for him, and he came closer, curling into my side and resting his head in that little dip between my tit and my shoulder.I put an arm around him and traced little patterns on his back with my fingertips.He put his hand on my belly, fingers spread wide.
