“I’m sorry.Who did what?”Mom cut in.
I was about to suggest we have the conversation later, but Diego smoothly jumped in and gave her the rundown: Who Toni is, why she was involved, and what her concerns were.
“Well, she sounds like a very suspicious person.Who obviously doesn’t know Taran,” Mom said primly.
Classic Mom response, honestly.
“She does not,” Diego agreed.“And she apologized to both of us.And then made really nice with Taran.”
“Yeah, by the time she left, I actually think she didn’t hate me anymore.”
Mom made a face but declined to comment on that.“Anyhow, sorry for interrupting, honey; you were saying about realizing you were all in?”
“Yeah, so, I went home that night and thought, like, if he really is trying to do some stupid power play game, what difference would it actually make to me?Like, would it change my mind about what I want?”
“And the answer was no?”Mom asked.
I nodded.
“Bro, major fucking red flag,” Diego said.
I shrugged.“One.In a sea of green flags.Worth the chance.”
“Was he always like this?Like, stupid and romantic?”Diego asked Mom.
She sighed.“I’m afraid so.And apparently more than he ever let on.Which is saying quite a lot.”
“Did he give you any other trouble?”Diego asked.“I bet he got away with everything, didn’t he?”
“Probably too much.He had the biggest eyes when he was a toddler.I couldn’t even bring myself to threaten him with a spanking, let alone give him one,” Mom mused.
Diego coughed to cover up a laugh.I had to bite my lip.Hard.
“Are you okay, sweetie?”she asked Diego, standing.“Let me get you some water.”
“Thank you.I—I guess I just forgot how to swallow,” he managed.
While my mother’s back was turned, I mouthed silently, “You’re the worst.”
His response was to lean over and smack the side of my ass under the table.
***
“You’re good for next weekend?”Mom asked as she kissed my cheek goodbye.
I nodded.“Wouldn’t miss it.Thanks for lunch.Brunch.The food.”
“She really loves you,” was the first thing Diego said after we got into the car.
“Well, yeah.She’s…” I was about to say that she was my mom.But in Diego’s world, things didn’t work like that.“When do I get to meet yours?”
“If you stick around for the winter holidays, I’ll take you.”He rolled his eyes.“But it won’t be like that.She’ll probably try and read your aura and align your chakras on day one.”
“Always thought those fuckers needed aligning.”
“Do you know what a chakra is?”
“No.Do you?”
