Scars.
Scars she covered with art.
My entire body stiffens.
She watches my face carefully. “Luke,” she says quietly, “I need you to promise me something.”
“Anything.”
“When I tell you certain things about my childhood, I need you to believe me. Do you trust me enough for that?”
There’s fear in her eyes. Not weakness. Fear of being misunderstood. I’ve never seen the first hint of fear in her before, and it bothers me that it’s emerging now.She’s so strong and has apparently faced so much. What would be left for her actually to fear now? There’s nothing I wouldn’t do to take that fear away from her.
“I will believe you,” I tell her, meaning it with everything I have.
She nods and leans back against me again. “I got the tattoos to cover the scars. If people are going to stare, they might as well have something interesting to look at.”
I don’t press for more. Not here. Not in front of everyone.
I just hold her tighter.
Across the pool, Dad is quieter than usual. He barely follows the conversation, seems distracted, and is almost irritated. When it’s time to leave, Brandon hugs Andi easily. Dad hesitates before he does the same. It’s only a second, but I see it. I’ve developed spotting the slightest hesitation into an art form.
And for reasons I can’t explain yet, that hesitation unsettles me more than anything else I’ve learned tonight.
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
ANDI
Between the gym, the youth center, and spending time with Luke, the past month has flown by. Luke and I have alternated staying at his apartment and my house, but we’ve hardly been apart at night. School has started back, so there are more kids at the youth center in the late afternoons. I’ve been spending more time there with the kids because so many parents aren’t home–whether they're working or just absent from their children's lives altogether.
There are a couple of girls who I’m afraid could drop out of school or get involved with the wrong crowd. I don’t want to fail them. I feel like we’ve come so far. I’ve been workingon a scholarship plan for them to get them out of the area and into one of the smaller universities. I talk to them daily about the advantages they will have if they just apply themselves. I’ve almost won them over.
Shane and Will came to the center last week, and I was surprised to see Luke walk in with them. Surprised and thrilled. While Shane and Will worked with the guys on boxing, Luke took several of the boys outside and taught them how to work in the yard. They spent the day doing manual labor to make the yard look great. I couldn’t give the boys and Luke enough praise for all they did. Several of the boys even said they enjoyed learning to landscape and making “their place” look nice. I think Luke has sparked a whole new type of interest for the youth center.
It's Friday afternoon, and for the first time in what feels like forever, Luke and I have separate plans tonight. I’m going out with my girlfriends—Christina, Tania, and Katie. Luke is going out with Shane, Will, and Brandon. I can’t help but smile at how jealous and possessive Luke is of me. I mean, does he not own a mirror? The man is gorgeous, he’s built like the most desired male model, and he’s just all-around great. The girls are always after him, and he's worried about some guy hitting on me. It’s comical, really.
We haven’t said those three little words yet, though I think he feels it. I know I do. I almost told him a couple ofweeks ago after my last karaoke performance. I sang Beyoncé’s “Crazy In Love” and made no attempt to hide that I was singing the lyrics just for him. He didn’t take his eyes off me the whole time. I left the stage and straddled him in his lap to sing the last verse, just for him.
Tonight will be fun with my girls, but I’m also looking forward to going home and seeing Luke. We’ve planned to meet back at my place, no matter how late it is. There’s no denying that we’re both deeply invested. And while I don’t know what he’ll say in return, I feel compelled to tell him that I love him. It’s something I need to express now, while it’s true and present, because I don’t want to regret holding it back when it means this much.
Luke calls just as I get home from the youth center.
“Hey, baby, what are you doing?” I answer.
“Sitting here missing you,” the low, sexy timbre of his voice sends chills through me even through the phone.
“I miss you, too. Wish I could see you. Where are y’all going tonight?” I purr back to him.
“Shane mentioned wanting to see a band playing here this weekend,” he says.
I laugh. “Hmm…I wonder if that’s the same band we’re going to see tonight.”
His sexy laugh rumbles through his chest. “I hope so. Then there’s no reason why I can’t sit with my girl on the guys’ night out.”
I want to say the words so much. But I don't want the first time I tell him to be over the phone. “I hope so, too. I would love to dance with my handsome man tonight. Maybe our friends know us well enough by now not to try to keep us apart.”
We talk for a few more minutes before I have to get ready, or I’ll be late meeting the girls for dinner. We hang up reluctantly, but only after I promise to text him where I am and let him know I’m safe. He’s protective by nature—even when he tries not to be—and despite what I pretend, I love that he cares enough to be.
