“See that you do.” For a brief, burning moment, Victoria gazed down at Anna with low-banked desire clear in her blue eyes. Then she caught Anna up in a blistering farewell kiss, a hand on the back of Anna’s head and the other squeezing a generous handful of Anna’s behind. “God, you are a delectable little woman. I really should not allow you to walk away from me.”
“Goodbye, Victoria.” Anna slithered, again reluctantly, out of Victoria’s grip and opened the door. She slid through it and closed it behind her before she could reconsider her decision and began walking to the point where she was to meet her Uber.
As she opened her phone up to see how close her driver was to arriving, a mail notification banner crossed her screen.Ugh.She could see it was from Marcus Kinkade. What a mood-killer. Against her better instincts, she opened it.
It was brief and unpleasant and it left a lump of iron sitting heavy in Anna’s stomach.I’m told you’re recusing yourself from Dr. Ellis’ case. If there’s an issue, the evaluatory board has a right to know the details. Please make room in your schedule for a meeting, you’ll receive an appointment in the morning. – M. Kinkade, Director of Surgical Services
Anna looked up at the bedroom window of Victoria’s condo, where behind the white curtains she could see the shadow of Victoria discarding her robe and climbing back into bed. “Well, fuck,” she said aloud, swallowing down the acid that began to climb up into her throat.
11
VICTORIA
Cameron O’Shea’s office in Staff Wellness was two doors down from Anna’s, but it was as clean-lined and minimalist as Anna’s was decidedly not. In fact, Victoria observed, it was rather a lot like her own living room.
Cameron, in a dark gold velvet Arlo & Jacob chair that matched the sofa Victoria was perched on, was, like Anna, a redhead. But his carefully sculpted hair was lighter, more ginger than auburn. His eyes were blue, not green. He wore a pale blue Tom Ford sweater and beautifully tailored light khaki trousers, a very far cry from Anna’s 90’s schoolteacher aesthetic.
He was also a man, of course, so there certainly wouldn’t be any of the yearning and entanglement that she’d gotten herself into with Anna. Well, that would be helpful.
If he would get the ball rolling and ask her questions, it would, anyway.
Victoria crossed her legs and leaned forward. “Well?”
“Well, what?” Cameron asked, lifting one ginger eyebrow.
“Did you want to get started or not?” she bit out sharply. “I don’t have all day.”
“Nor do I,” he replied, looking wholly unbothered by her acidity. “I was waiting on you to tell me you wanted to begin.”
Ridiculous. “I’m here, aren’t I? Of course I want to begin.”
He smiled faintly. “I also wanted to see some of the famous Victoria Ellis bite, to see how easy you might be to provoke.” With a flourish, he twisted his ink pen open and made a note in the small leather-bound book in his lap. “That was easier than I thought it would be.”
“You’re a horse’s ass,” Victoria spat.
“And you really are an easy mark.” He looked up at her, gaze cool but curious. “You’re sharp and reactive. Not bad qualities in general, but you really are a very tightly strung woman. If we could file some of the edge off of that, it might make it easier for you to begin understanding and controlling your panic attacks when they hit.” He scribbled down more notes. “I’d like it if eventually, you found yourself catching those sharp reactions and stopping to ask yourself, ‘What’s making me feel this way?’” When he looked back up at Victoria, the cool combative look in his eyes had given way to cautious friendliness. “Being able to analyze a situation and your reactions to it might help you with eventually learning how to head off the anxiety and anger before it can take hold.”
“Oh.” The logic of it surprised her. “That… does make some sense.” She felt a bit disloyal to Anna for preferring this approach. “But Dr. Monroe thought it might help me to foster a more generally calm environment in my life, to practice meditation and treat myself well.”
“I don’t discount the approach, and if what she’s suggested has been helping you and you like doing it, then I hope you continue,” Cameron advised. “But I also like a pragmatic approach. Perhaps we can blend what Anna’s helped you with into my more analytical methods and come up with something that’s uniquely suited to helping you, Dr. Victoria Ellis.”
She found she liked the idea. “Right.” Now, she felt comfortable enough to lean back on the gold velvet sofa. “All right. Well, then, let’s sally forth, shall we?”
At the end of the hour, she was pleased to find that she didn’t feel combative and wound up. She was a bit tired, really. Cameron had probed, and instead of backing off like Anna had when Victoria reacted poorly to a line of questioning, he asked her to examine that reaction and then consider his question again. It wasn’t easy to face, and if she hadn’t been through a few weeks of Anna’s gentler methods first she thought she’d have stomped right out of Cameron’s office and never returned. But Anna’s skillful, careful work had laid a good foundation for Cameron to manage, so Victoria found herself ready to come back.
“I’d like to see you three mornings a week,” he said, much to Victoria’s surprise.
“Really? So often?” she asked, her hackles immediately up. Even Anna hadn’t necessarily wanted that much of her time.
“I’m given to understand time is of the essence.” Cameron consulted his notes. “And Anna’s done really good work with you, so that should make things easier on us both.” He smiled. “Don’t you worry. We’ll get you in tip-top shape for anything coming your way. But I do see that there’s an evaluation coming in just a few more weeks, so I don’t want to lose a moment of time.”
“I… see.” She didn’t. But perhaps she was well overdue a talk with Elaine. No one had warned her that the evaluation would be so soon. Well, she’d pop in on Anna after this, then go see Elaine before her afternoon slate of surgeries. “Well. Thank you for today, Dr. O’Shea. I appreciate your candor and logic.”
“Thank you for being open to new approaches.” He guided her to the door, opened it and looked out. “Have a wonderful day.”
She waited for him to close the door behind her before glancing at Anna’s door and seeing it cracked open. Walking over, she listened for a moment to be sure no one else was in there before slipping in quickly and shutting it behind her. “Hello there.”
“ Victoria, hi.” In her green chair by the window, Anna looked up from the notes in her lap and smiled. It was a brief smile, though, replaced quickly with worry. “I only have a few moments before Kathleen brings in my next patient.”
