Taking a deep breath in, she sighed heavily. She’d done it before. She’d got over him before, so she’d be able to do it again. She would. She just needed to…
Who was she kidding? It wasn’t that easy. He’d come into her life again, and she’d immediately believed they were meant to be, their relationship was meant to be. It wouldn’t be that easy to just forget about him again. It wouldn’t be that easy to convince herself she hadn’t just lost the love of her life, her soulmate, for the second time around.
Rubbing the heels of her hands across her eyes, she started the ignition. Home. That’s where she wanted to be right now. That’s where she needed to be. Curled up on her squishy sofa in her little cottage, in her little corner of Meadowfield.
As she drove the short distance, she kept her eyes fixed on the road, mindful that at any point Claudette might make a reappearance.
After pulling up in front of her cottage, she got out of the car, keeping her fingers crossed Mrs Jedd hadn’t seen her arrive. The gnome’s nose could wait further inspection.
As Ellie hurried to the gate, she kept one eye on Mrs Jedd’s cottage, sure she’d just seen the net curtains twitch.Please don’t come after me, not today.
Closing the gate behind her, Ellie ducked her head as she pulled her mobile from her pocket again. Still nothing. How could Murray have left without a word, without so much as a message?
‘Eleanor.’
It was quiet, the word, her name. Barely a whisper, but she recognised the voice. She knew who had uttered it. Spinning slowly on the spot, she turned towards the front door and there, sitting on the front step, hugging a huge fluffy sheep, was Murray.
In one instant, her heart leapt, in the next, an overwhelming fear encompassed her. Stepping forward, she watched as Murray held out his hand, palm forward, and she paused again.
‘Just come down the path slowly. This one seems particularly jumpy right now.’ Murray gave a tiny, nervous smile.
Nodding, Ellie squashed the urge to run to him and instead inched her way down the path, keeping one eye on Claudette and one on Murray, unsure of who may choose to bolt first.
As she reached them, Murray put his hand out towards her. Taking it tentatively, she allowed him to guide her towards the step next to him and lowered herself onto the cool concrete. ‘I thought you’d left without saying goodbye.’
Keeping one hand on Claudette, Murray held his arm out towards her.
‘I’m sorry, Eleanor.’
Sliding across the step, she leaned her head on his shoulder as he lowered his arm around hers. ‘My mum told me she spoke to you.’ She swiped at the fresh tears running down her cheeks. Was she supposed to be grateful that he’d swung by to say goodbye? She’d hated the fact he’d left without so much as a text, but this, him being here, holding her like this, was this really a kinder goodbye? Perhaps she should have been grateful when she’d thought he’d just upped and left.
‘She did.’ Briefly lifting his arm from her shoulder, he ran his palm over his face. ‘I didn’t realise how much I hurt you before. When I left…’
She closed her eyes and braced herself.
‘When I left before, I was so wrapped up in what I’d lost, what I had to do, what was expected of me, I guess I didn’t realise how much it had affected you too. And I don’t want that to happen again. I don’t want to ever put you in that position again.’
‘I know. So, you were going to just leave without saying goodbye. You were going to leave before things had the chance to get serious between us again,’ she whispered.
‘Yes. I packed up my workshop, told Laura and Jackson I couldn’t finish their job. I just couldn’t bear thinking about how much I’d hurt you before, and I had to make sure it wouldn’t happen again. I couldn’t let it happen again.’ His voice cracked. ‘I’d never have forgiven myself.’
She nodded, her cheek still against the fabric of his shirt. She could smell the familiar aroma of his aftershave mixed with the fresh pine from his workshop. She could hardly breathe. The need to pull away and end the embrace, to stop prolonging the inevitable pain, fought against her desire to stay in his arms for as long as she possibly could and to savour the last few moments she would share with him, for as long as possible.
‘And then, as I was driving away, I realised I was too late.’
Ellie glanced up at him. Too late for what? Too late to end things with a simple text?
‘I realised things had already got serious between us and that if I just upped and left, I wouldn’t just be hurting myself, I’d be hurting you too. Again.’
Looking at her hands, she picked at the cuticles on her forefinger, hardly daring to breathe. What was he saying? What was he trying to tell her? ‘What do you mean?’
‘I mean, I want to be with you. I want to stay here in Meadowfield with you. You’re the reason I moved here, and I want to make Meadowfield my home. I want to make you my home.’ He cleared his throat. ‘If you’ll have me?’
Focusing on her hands, she held her breath. Was he really saying what she thought he was? ‘Do you mean…?’
‘I mean, I love you, Eleanor Newton, and I want to build a life with you.’
She twisted on the step and looked into his eyes. ‘Do you really mean that?’
