“I’ll never want another woman,” he told her. “It’s only you, now and forever.”
“Aye,” she whispered. “You belong to me, and I to you.”
***
Sybil ran her fingertips over Rory’s chest. Though her body felt weak and sated after their long night of lovemaking, her emotions were in turmoil. Each time they made love, she felt more and more guilty.
Secrets were a common currency at court. She had learned at her grandfather’s knee that a wise person drew out other people’s secrets and kept her own. She had followed his admonition without guilt for years.
Yet the deeper Rory found his way into her heart, the more it felt wrong not to reveal her secret to him.
“I’m amazed at how fate brought us together,” Rory said, and kissed her forehead. “The wisest thing I ever did was gamble with your brother.”
She squeezed her eyes closed and prayed to God to grant her the strength to tell him the truth.
There’s something I must tell you…As she practiced the words in her head, her heart pounded like a caught rabbit that sees the cleaver in the cook’s hand.
Rory propped his head on his elbow. This would be easier if he were not looking at her like that. She licked her dry lips and drew in a deep breath.
“I wanted you from the first moment I saw you,” he said. “But everything about you warned me not to trust you.”
Perhaps he was right not to trust her then, but he must see that he could trust her now.
“You’d spent too much time at court,” he continued, “and your family is known for their lack of loyalty and their utter disregard for anyone or anything that does not serve their own interests.”
Knowing that, she was surprised he hadn’t left her where he found her.
“If that weren’t reason enough,” he said, “I could see ye were a beauty accustomed to bending men to your will, and you were desperate.”
Her heart ached. She had never meant to carry the deceit this far. She’d only intended to rely on the deceit until she found a safe refuge. She had not known that her only refuge would be here with him.
“Day by day, ye broke through all the barriers I erected.” A soft light warmed his eyes as he cupped her cheek with his palm. “Ye showed me a generous spirit and a loyal heart, supporting me at every turn.”
Sybil choked back tears.
“When we make love,” he said, “I feel as though ye show me your soul and look into mine.”
Aye, it feels exactly like that.
“I need to tell ye what is in my heart,mo leannain,” he said, brushing the tear that spilled down her cheek with his thumb. “I love you.”
Mary, Mother of God, help me.She had to tell him now. Not because he would forgive her now that he loved her, but because she loved him too.
Until she told him, this lie would always be between them, corroding their bond, eating away at her heart and tainting the beauty of the love that had grown between them.
“I love you too, with all my heart,” she said. “I think I have for a long time.”
“I was afraid to hope.” He pulled her into his arms and gave her a deep kiss. His lips were warm and soft, and she never wanted the kiss to end. And yet she forced herself to push him away and sit up.
“My love,” she said in a choked voice, “there is something else I must tell you.”
“What more do I need to know than that ye love me?” Rory sat up and took her face between his hands. “You’ve made me a happy man.”
Rory’s smile faded as he examined her face. The wariness that entered his eyes tested her strength, but she could not let this deceit lie between them for another day or another hour. She took his hands from her face and held them in her lap. Before she lost her courage, she forced herself to meet his eyes and tell him.
“I have a confession to make.”
CHAPTER 29
