Laura was very still. "What kind of episode?" she said.
"A seizure," he told her and ignored the ache in his heart when he did so. "Hannah found me. Daniel sent for a doctor in London."
Outside, he could hear Hannah somewhere in the corridor, talking to Miss Roseberry about something with her usual certainty. The ordinary sounds of an afternoon at Acklan, going on around them as though nothing had changed.
"And what did the doctor say?" Laura asked.
"That it might never happen again," James said and offered what he hoped was his most reassuring smile.
She waited, not fooled by his smile in the least.
"Or that it might," he admitted. "And if it does…” He heaved another sigh. “Well, it could be worse if there’s a next time."
The afternoon light came through the study windows, pale and flat, the same light that had been there all day. Nothing dramatic. Just the day progressing as it always did. "How much worse?" Laura asked, her voice quiet as she took his measure.
"He didn’t elaborate," James said with a shrug. But the idea of his impending death hung in the air just the same. He shook the memory from his mind. "He said a great many men have led long and full lives after a single event. There is no way to guarantee the outcome either way."
"Is that everything?" she asked.
When he said nothing, she narrowed her eyes on him.
“There’s more, James,” she told him. “Have you forgotten how well I know you?”
James knew her just as well. At nineteen, Laura had suffered at the hands of the worst sort of man and she had never fully recovered. Even now at thirty-three, he didn’t want to add to her burdens. He didn’t want to be responsible for causing her even a moment of pain or worry.
“James…” she prodded, her blue eyes appearing steelier than they had even moments before.
The corridor outside had gone quiet. Hannah had moved on somewhere, taking her certainty with her. But she was never far from his thoughts.
“I’m worried about Hannah,” he finally told his sister. He’d barely acknowledged that truth to himself. “I’m worried about what happens to her if the worst should happen to me.”
“Oh, James.”
"Daniel will be in Bermuda,” he said. “Aunt Harriet will not live forever. And?—”
“You are not going anywhere,” Laura said as though she would not allow such an outcome. “But should the worst happen, you know that I will always see to Hannah.”
James’ heart twisted. “I could never ask that of you.” After all, she’d been forced to give up her own babe all those years ago. Since her eventual marriage to Fairleigh, she’d never been blessed with another child. That loss had become a part of who she was and James could not ask her to face that heartache every day.
“I will not break,” she told him with a slight shake of her head. "Thomas and I have talked about this before.” She shifted a bit in her seat. "Well, not about this specifically, of course. But we have talked about Hannah. About what we would do if you needed us. He and I are of a mind. We’re not going anywhere you can’t reach us."
"You have a life in Middlesbrough," James said.
"We do have a life in Middlesborough," she agreed. "But that is not our whole life. You are part of it and Daniel. And Hannah is part of it too.” She heaved a sigh and an anguished expression settled on her brow. “You should have told me six weeks ago, James."
"I didn’t want to worry you," he said.
“I have worried about you and Daniel since you were born.” She shook her head. “But don’t worry. I’ll take this up with our brother as well. The two of you should’ve known better than to keep something like this from me.”
At least Daniel would get his own lump of medicine, James supposed.
"Whatever happens in the future, whatever your doctor says, you will tell me."
"Yes," he agreed, properly chastised by her as he had been many times in his youth.
"Good." She pushed from her chair, crossed to his side of the desk, and put her hand against his face the way she had when he was small and she was the closest thing to a mother he had left. He sat very still and let her. "Because you are not going to die," she said, quiet and firm. "I refuse to allow it."
"I shall pass that along to the relevant authorities," he said.
