Alec shook his head. “She was impossible to navigate. A minor infraction, a missed buttonhole or scuffed boots could set her off. While an errant fireball that burned a crofter’s cottage to the ground would garner nothing more than a yawn.”
“She sounds erratic,” Poppy said before she thought the better of criticizing his mother and covered her mouth with her hand.
“Not erratic,” he said. “Focused.”
Poppy blinked at him.
Alec heaved a sigh. “It took me a while to realize that it wasn’t the infraction itself that she found offensive and stoked embers of her anger. It was simply me.”
“You?”
He shook his head one more. “No matter what my brother did, he could do no wrong in her eyes. He did, one time, actually set a crofter’s cottage on fire and she did not care a whit. On the other hand, I could never please her. I think she disliked me upon my birth. My very existence grated on her nerves.”
Well, that didn’t seem possible. Poppy didn’t remember her own mother, but she’d watched Caroline dote on and love Georgie and Bella since the moment they were born. Her stepmother was a kind woman, but certainly even those less doting than Caroline had some sort of maternal bond for with their infant children.
“I had ideas and a mind of my own, and she tried everything to break the stubbornness from my spirit.” He shrugged. “Failing at that, she decided that if I could not be controlled then I did not deserve the powers I’d been born with. So, she stripped them from me before my sixteenth birthday, the age of assent.”
How horrible! Poppy sucked in a breath.
“I was furious, as you can imagine. I cursed her, my father, my brother. Then I saved my allowance, lied about my age and bought my commission before my seventeenth birthday. I have not seen her since. I did not even send word when I heard my father had died.”
“That sounds like a very lonely existence.” Poppy couldn’t imagine being so alone in the world. As much as her sisters annoyed her, she couldn’t fathom a life without them, quiet as it would be.
“Oh, I gained quite a bit in the army. Friends. A purpose.” He shook his head. “It was hardly the path I’d been born to, but it was a way for me to forge my own destiny. It was the path open to me and I thrived. One does not need magic to live a full life.”
But even as he said those words, she could tell from his tone that he didn’t truly believe them. How she would ache from the loss of her magic, should it ever be taken away again. She’d only had it for a year, most of that time not knowing what to do with it. But to have had such power since birth and then have it stripped away? The mere idea pained her to her core.
“Thank you for telling me,” she said softly, reaching for his hand. And truly, she felt honored that he’d shared such a personal story with her, that he’d trusted her enough to tell her about his past.
He was so handsome, so genuine, strong and admirable. She squeezed his hand, hoping—
Alec’s gaze settled to her lips and she hoped he might kiss her this time, but then his eyes drifted lower to the edge of her wrap. He swallowed. “It’s late. You should go back to bed,” he said, pulling his hand back from her.
She felt the loss instantly. “I—”
“Deserve more than I couldeveroffer you.” He pushed off the settee, seeming uncomfortable all of a sudden. “I think I’d best get that air now.”
And then he was gone, leaving Poppy to stare after him. Had he told her too much and now regretted his frankness? Or had he suddenly become aware of her state of dishabille? Poppy’s cheeks warmed.
Oh, she wanted to run after him to tell him how wonderful she thought he was, how brave, how clever…
But she could not risk making such a fool of herself and certainly not in her current state of undress. No, no, not two nights in a row. She’d wait until morning to see him. Perhaps in the light of day, his regret would dissipate and they could start anew.
* * *
For the firsttime in over a year, Poppy did not dream about finding Alec at the Halwell crossroads. In fact, she didn’t have any sort of dream at all, at least not one she remembered when she awoke in the morning. Strange, that. She’d been so accustomed to that dream. Then again, that first dreamhadcome to fruition. What would be the point in dreaming about a past event? The past could not be changed, and she was a Seer.
Poppy caught a glimpse of the invitation to the witches’ ball on her bedside table and her heart raced a bit. The last thing she should do is leave that out in the open where her maid would find it. She and Laurel would be the talk of Halwell Chase and probably all of Devon, otherwise.
So, Poppy slid from bed, careful not to disturb her sleeping cat, before tucking the invitation inside the front cover of Maria Edgeworth’sThe Absentee.Then she promptly rang for her maid.
Once her maid appeared, Poppy quickly bathed and rushed through her morning ablutions. She settled on her favorite jonquil day dress and then headed down to the breakfast room. She’d hoped to find Alec there, that he could answer all the questions she had about Lady Wharton’s ball. Unfortunately, she found her stepmother and Bella there instead. She shouldn’t have been surprised, however. Alec was so attentive to his injured friend that he was probably breaking his fast with Daniel.
So, Poppy made polite conversation until she could excuse herself, then she went directly to her cousin’s bedchamber.
The door was open.
Surprisingly, the room was empty except for the maid who was stripping the sheets from the bed. What in the world? With Daniel’s broken leg, shouldn’t he still be abed? Had something else happened to her cousin?
