Sadly, he loved her too much to watch her destroy herself. He knew Kol wanted her angry and rash and running right to him without a single ally behind her. And Andrian would risk a moment of her anger to hold onto a lifetime of her.
“I won’t,” he said. “Because you need to hear this,nio. You need to know the things she said—the things she said aboutyou.”
“Stop,” Mariah whispered again. Tears lined her eyes. Pain pricked Andrian’s heart, but he had to get these words out. No matter how much she didn’t want to hear them.
Especiallybecause she didn’t want to hear them.
“She wouldn’t have wanted this. She wouldn’t have wanted you to risk yourself so recklessly. She would’ve wanted you to be patient, to wait for your allies, to protect yourself?—”
“Donot,” Mariah interrupted, voice a low growl. “Do not fuckingdarepretend like you know my mother better than I do. Reading her words in an old diary meansnothing.”
“Then look me in the eye and tell me she would support this. Right now.” Andrian held her glare, the challenge in him rising to meet her.
Yes, it hurt him to do so.
No, that didn’t mean he would just let her win.
“She wouldn’t have supported our plan before Khento, either,” Mariah seethed. “But you went right along with that one, didn’t you?” She pushed into him, lip lifting in a snarl. “What makes this different? You already killed one father; don’t you want the other to meet the same fate, too?”
Andrian’s world stalled.
He struggled to find his words. To unlock his mind and tell her that yes, of course, he did; but also no, he regretted killing Julian. Or at the very least, he felt conflicted about it.
But she knew all of that.
This was her anger and her fear speaking for her. That didn’t stop the blow from landing.
She wasn’t done.
“Maybe you were right, all along.” Mariah crowded into him. Light and fire flickered in her irises. He’d never seen her look at him with so much fury. “Maybe you have been poisoned against me. Maybeyouare the reason my mother is dead.”
“No.” Andrian finally managed the word, though it was weak on his tongue. “No. You know this, Mariah. All I have ever cared about is protecting you?—”
“And look what good it’s done.” She stepped away, leaving his space, though it felt like hot coals dragging over his skin. “Maybe I don’t want you protecting me. Maybe all I want is to protectmyself.”
Footsteps crashed through the underbrush. Matheo emerged from the tree line, still lacing his pants. His eyes bounced between Mariah and Andrian.
“Is something wrong?—”
“We’re leaving.” Mariah swung herself into her saddle, wheeling her horse toward the road. Matheo scrambled up on his horse and followed, confusion still written on his face.
Andrian waited by that stream for a moment longer, listening to their retreating hoof steps.
Gathering himself.
Composing himself.
His chest was cracking, yawning open inside him. His mind knew that the things she’d said weren’t true. That she was driven by vengeance and rage and unable to see what was before her.
This was the problem with being known so fully by someone.
When they wanted to hurt, when they wanted to leave a mark that would cut deep, they knew exactly where to strike.
Maybe he deserved it, though. Maybe shewasright.
He’d always known it. Always known that at the end of all this, he would be the reason for her demise.
But he’d never been a very strong man.
