“How the fuck did you know how to inhale?” I ask, taking it back off her when she gives me it.
She hikes up a shoulder, resting her back against my knee as my fingers drag through her dark locks. “I tried it once with Jenna years ago.”
“Do you like it?”
She scrunches her nose up and says, “Not really,” then forces down a swallow, her voice dropping like a slow purr. “I don’t why I like when you do.”
The corner of my lip curls, kissing her forehead and holding it there when my phone vibrates in my pocket, and I know it’s time to leave her.
Tilting her chin up with my finger, I stare into her eyes. The blue glitters under the moonlight, like witnessing a rare gemstone. And in all honesty, she is.
There isn’t another like her.
“Do you have to go?” she asks when she notices my silence, dropping her gaze to my lips, then back.
“I do, darling.” Those words do something horrible to me; they feel like a lie.
I don’t have to do any of the shit I’m doing, not if I really didn’t want to. Though I made a promise to my dad, and I’m a man of my word. It kills me to leave her, and selfishly, I know I’d never see her again if she knew what I was up to.
She wouldn’t understand, and I don’t want her to.
As long as I keep this up, one day I’ll never have to worry about her coming to the same sort of harm my mum did; they’ll never hurt anyone else when I get to them.
Her hand fists around the collar of my hoodie, pulling me to her. Our lips lock, and I stroke my tongue against hers, claiming her as mine.
When I break the kiss, my eyes are slow to open. I cup her cheek and glide my thumb against those full lips as I struggle to say, “I’ll see you when I get back.”
A knowing smile tilts her lips, and she kisses me again, allowing me to get lost in her as the night stretches on.
That one word.
Four letters.
Aches to be voiced.
13
Indie
my sacrifice - creed
Present Day
Stuffingmyhandsintomy pockets, I roll back on my feet, hearing her footsteps grow louder from outside her room. “Hey,” I say as soon as the door to her room opens, showing Jenna in her matching, but extremely oversized leggings and hoodie.
I make a mental note to see if Dawson can order her something that actually fits.
“Hi.” She smiles, and this time, it looks a little less forced.
Stepping into her room, I drop down on the couch, emptying my pockets of the hidden protein bars we’ve been stocking for her.
The guys are onto us, well not Regina and I particularly, just that there’s a thief ransacking the good shit. “How you feeling today?” I ask, watching her sit on the bed, crossing her legs.
“The nightmares are still intense, hence the eyebags.” She drags her fingers down her cheek, sighing.
“Yeah, they’re the hardest to shake off.” They’ll never completely go.
Even though my ordeal happened once, it’s traumatic enough to last a lifetime. Jenna had to go through it repeatedly for six years.
